Looking back...

It's quite entertaining to review my old journal entries. Here are three from 2002, 2003, 2004.... dunno what happened in 2005 and 2006. And funny how it's always in October!!!


10/18/2004
I am: rather busy these days
I think: I need to sit down, relax and regroup
I know: the Niners are better than our records show
I want: to make a difference
I have: homework to do but I'm procrastinating
I wish: I can help Francisco
I hate: hearing myself complain
I miss: my college days
I fear: I will snap one of these days
I hear: discussions of how sorry the Niners and Raiders are
I wonder: where I'll be same time next year
I regret: not working harder when I was in middle school
I love: hearing the laughter of children
I ache: cuz gas prices are so high
I care: for the braves souls in Iraq defending America, defending freedom
I always: lose my cool
I am: a hypocrite
I dance: along with my kids
I sing: when exaulting in joy and sadness
I cry: for no reason whatsoever
I do: well in putting on a fake happy face
I fight: anger and hate within me
I write: so I may record feelings today for reading tomorrow
I win: when I've tried my hardest and come out on top
I lose: far too often
I confuse: people with my multiple personalities
I listen: to Francisco and try to understand what he's saying
I can: be a better role model
I need: seek anger management
I am: approaching an age where I must face the facts of male pattern baldness
I should: follow my dreams...instead of just dreaming about them.


10/7/2003
I am: spent
I think: I should move on with life
I know: we coulda killed the Marlins and won the World Series
I want: to grab some Z's
I have: a thorn in my side
I wish: I can move on with my life
I hate: having to deal with this every day
I miss: my Joycie
I fear: my feelings will never be the same after this.
I hear: people talking about October baseball, and the Giants aren't part of it
I wonder: how long it will take for this to subside
I regret: not having the self-control to subdue these feelings
I love: to drop everything and move to the east coast to start over
I ache: in the heart from this hollow hollow feeling
I care: my mom who's been experiencing major back pains
I always: get caught up in the heat of the moment
I am: too damn romantic
I dance: like a man on crutches
I sing: while I play my song on the guitar
I cry: when I realize there is no hope
I do: things I wouldn't have done just to keep pace
I fight: the impossible by dreaming the impossible dream
I write: to relieve internal combustable fumes
I win: cuz I've made it this far and have held on firmly
I lose: cuz I don't know how much longer I can hold on
I confuse: myself with the lack of self-control
I listen: to laughter from the next aisle down
I can: not concentrate on anything else
I need: to move on and never be hungry again
I am: still feeling very hollow
I should: finish up my duties here and move on with life somewhere else


10/24/2002
I am: a skeptic
I think: therefore I doubt
I know: money CAN buy happiness
I want: to play golf
I have: an undying yearn to travel
I wish: to have infinite amount of wishes
I hate: feminists who still expect men to pay for dinner or open the door...
I miss: the days when I don't have to drive to everywhere I go
I fear: death of a close one
I hear: fans rootin' for the Giants
I wonder: if I'll ever grow up
I regret: dropping out of Chinese school
I love: YOU
I ache: in my heart then my left arm...
I care: for anyone who deserves to be cared for
I always: complain
I am not: wise in investments
I dance: with two left feet
I sing: in the showers
I cry: pretty much all the time
I do not always: give up
I fight: ignorance
I write: short incoherent emails
I win: when my team wins
I lose: when I win but my team doesn't
I confuse: Everyone
I listen: to the wise
I can usually be found: online (prior to my new job)
I need: to be left alone
I am happy about: having great friends
I should: get to work...