Graduation

"You have fought the good fight.  You have finished the race.  And you have kept the faith." - 2 Tim 4:6

Another year bites the dust... good job students!!  And now I get my Tuesday evenings back. 

Adieu

An email I wrote to some of our CS Brothers and Sisters...

Family Softball

Towards the end of the school year... SW was gloating how he's awesome at softball, batting 1.000 in PE.  So when the announcement came out asking for players... I signed us up for the church league.  A couple weeks ago... they had finals... so they didn't play.  This time around... they got to wear a glove, get in the box, and take a mighty swing.  

NN went 2 for 3 with a walk.  No defensive plays but impressed a lot of people with her hustle on the base paths.  She was a clam.

SW went 1 for 3 with a walk.  His first hit came at a clutch moment in the game too... when it was two outs and I was on third.  "Bring dad home! Bring dad home!!" was the chant.  Defensively, he picked up a fly ball and threw it to the cutoff man.

I went 3 for 4... with 1 error at short, when the ball was hit hard up the middle and took a tricky bounce.   Nate had me batting cleanup!! HA!! He must think I'm good or something.  Ah wellz.

I was quite happy tonight.  Quite happy!  To be able to hang out with the kids at their age and at mine... what a blessing. Was burnt to a crisp from a day long outdoor volleyball tournament though... but today... was a good day.

Tahoe Camping - Day 3

Woke up to a nice buffet breakfast. The three families got together to recount last night's event over coffee and juice.  Then by 9AM... we headed back to camp to pack up.  When we got there, it was a ghost town!!  Everyone... and I mean EVERYONE has left.  They either left last night when we evacuated.  Or they broke down camp early in the morning.  We searched for our belongings and they were all there. 

After packing... decided to hit up the nearby beach for a few minutes.  A few minutes turned into a few hours.  The kids wanted to have fun.  The adults needed to relax a bit.  So I went to the general store and grabbed a 12 pack.  Grabbed some chairs and beach mats.  And before long...the tats broke out their stove and we had ourselves a feast.  We rented a SUP and kayak.  Played some volleyball.  Chatted.  Laughed. Good food.  Good scenes. Good company.  

Wasn't exactly how I imagined it going... but alas... a wonderful way to wrap up 3 days of camping.

Tahoe Camping Day 2 - The Bear

 Continuation of Day 2....

We started to head back to camp... about 10 minutes from the pier... NN realizes she lost her phone.  But she doesn't have Find My turned out (d'oh!!).  But thankfully... some nice person found it and turned it into the Lost and Found.  So we picked up our phone.. picked up a nice Starbucks and off we went.

Got back to camp and folks had already started cooking.  We were in the middle camp so I started a fire... having a feeling that dinner was going to be at our picnic table.  This time I was smart... found a bunch of dry pine needles... giant pine cones... and the fire was blazing in two minutes.  I'm a pro at this now... I can make it to the final 3 if Jeff ever summons me.

Dinner was.... uhhhh-mazing!!!!!!  That Tat's bought chicken and duck that can be eaten cold.  They made some stew that we needed to reheat.  We had packs and packs of instant noodles.  And they even brought a rice cooker. Hehehehhee... camping like the Chinese do!!  Everyone showered... had their filling... and out of the blue... we hear a lot of honking from a short distance away.  First I thought it was someone's car alarm going off... then a bunch of other cars started honking.  Turns it... it was an attempt to scare off a bear!!  Roy goes and checks out what happened... and we heard "BANG! BANG! BANG!"  Someone brought an air gun and used it.  Rumors start flying that it was a giant bear that carried off someone's cooler.  And ran into the woods again.  

We didn't think much of it so we continued cleaning up and started to make smores.  Everyone settled into a bit and was having a good time when to our left... we heard a bunch of honking again!  This time it was loud and persistent.  And then... our neighbors to the left, almost like a marching army, got up in unison and started running for their cars.  We saw them do it... and I gave the command, "Let's go!"  I didn't know what was going on... but didn't want to take a chance.  Me... Joyce... the kids... and the Yu's... all 7 of us piled into our dinky little CRV.  YY was still carrying her half melted marshmellow - getting it onto everything.  We got in... I closed the door...  looked over my shoulder and there it was.  A medium size black bear... running through our neighbor's campsite.  Then it dawned on me.  Our locker is still open!!!  Our garbage is still out!!!  And like a bundle of laundry... that brown fuzzball rolled onto my campsite.  It was literally 10 feet away from the car... sniffing through garbage.. trying to find a meal or two.  Out of the corner of my eye... I then see a park ranger... slowly creep out of the bushes holding a rifle - which I think is a tranquilizer.  He slowly got closer on his approach and "zip!!!" fired away.  I didn't see or hear the bear go down.... so it must've run off.  The ranger also disappeared... he must be on hot pursuit. 

We were now at a lost... not entirely sure what to do, we decided to go take showers and then decide.  Joyce and I were on the same page.  The bear's gone...he's scared... we're safe. Right???  After showering, we came back and our neighbors thought we left.  They were packing already and calling it a weekend.  We repacked everything... sticking it in the bear locker... throwing away the garbage and got into our tents.  Then all of a sudden... blaring horns again!!!  The third time!!! That's when I decided... gotta get the wife and kids to safety.  I told them to run for the car.  This time... we're outta here.  Gonna get a hotel and not taking chances again.

Evacuation... never had to do it.  Have heard about it... seen it on TV.  But when it comes down to it... what do you really need when your life depends on it.  Car keys... phone...wallet.  Wallet!!! OH NO!!! Left my wallet in the tent.  That's when I made that precarious 10 feet trek from car to tent... and voila... I am whole again. HA!!  We made it our hotel... nice warm and clean bed.  Calling it a night... good night!!

Tahoe Camping Day 2 - The Lake

 I got up... went to pee... and decided to take a stroll.  One night into camp... and one of the two toilets was already clogged with toilet paper and sh*t.  How are we gonna survive???  I got to the beach and the scene was majestic.  God is amazing.  He truly is.  I got my me time in and walked back to came and it was feee-reeezing!!!

Tried lighting the fire again... cuz it was so cold. Had a lot harder time this time because our fuel was damp from the morning dew.  Thankfully, we were able to borrow a torch from our neighbors.  Before we knew it... everyone was awake and we feasted on a warm meal of instant noodles and canned Vienna sausages. Ironically.. everyone was complaining how noisy it was at night... and here they were speaking a high volume.  I cringed and rolled my eyes at their hypocrisy. Oh well...

Slowly and surely, everyone got up and within a blink of an eye... it was time to set out.  Yu Tai was brave and bold enough to take the kids to Treetop.  While the rest of us went to enjoy a nice hike in the wilderness.  But unfortunately.. all the trails we wanted to go to were closed for construction!! Boo... ended up hiking a long road down to Emerald Bay and back up.  I got so bored with that hike... I took a detour just to walk some rough rocky terrain.  It's a hike, for crying out loud!!!

After the hike... we would rendevous at the harbor for our 2 hour pontoon ride.  Yes, there was valet parking, but no, I wasn't about to pay.  So I parked on the street... sent the address to the Tat's and Yu's.  GUess what... they followed my lead!! HA!!  

Everyone got together... and we got on our pontoon.  Everyone was disappointed.  We wanted a boat with a slide... or a faster speed boat.  But we got... exactly what it's described as... a friggin pontoon!! Ok...it's not that slow.  From South Tahoe... it was 30 minutes to Emerald Bay.  The water was freezing cold.  I brought an ice chest... but didn't bring any adult drinks (much to many people's disappointment) and no one was in the mood to get in.  We finally park at Emerald Bay... and I needed to set an example.  Everyone wanted to go in... but no one dared.  So I finally put on my life jacket and dove head first.  DANG the water was freezing.  Once I got in... some of the girls followed.  DANG... the water was freezing.  Then I tried to swim back to the boat... but the current kept pushing me away.  I saw the two girls successfully swim back.  I got jealous, but relieved.  They were safe.  Farther and farther I drifted away.  I strugged and I tried.  I kicked. I crawled (figureatively).  But the boat got smaller and smaller.  

My head suddenly thought... would I freeze to death??? (It was in the high 60's... no where near freezing).  Then I thought... would I drown??? (I had a life jacket on).  For some reason... no one on the boat cared... and no one was coming to save me.  Then I saw these three paddle boat guys.  I waved to them..."Can I get a ride?" The first person waved back... and started leaving.  I'm like, "No... don't leave me!!"  I thought he was making a U-turn... but he never came back.  His two friends started coming and I called for them again... this time, the sorta kinda understood me.  I waved and pointed to the boat.  And I said, "You speak English?"  They said, "No... Ukraine."  Ohhhhh... no wonder the first dude left.   The two friends tried to circle... and they were having a hard time pushing towards me due to the current.  With their broken English and my zero Russian... they asked why my friends won't come.  They even shouted on my behalf, "Your people!!!!"  By now... the third friend realized what was happening and turned back.  We were able to communicate with "You tired?" and "You cold?"  They quickly realized that I needed a place to hang onto.  And they know that the current was simply too strong.  The pontoon had a big tube for us to play on... and they finally tossed it in the water.  My three Ukrainian friends went to grab it and brought it over to me.  Even then... I wasn't able to simply hop on the tube, they had to give me a giant lift.  

After what seemed like eternity... I finally got on the tube.  It got roped up.  And I was back on the boat.  Phew...... this is the 2nd time of nearly drowning!! The first time was in Hawaii in that little lagoon. Man.. .I needa get better with swimming.

Anyhoo... I got back on the boat and I wanted to show everyone I wasn't scared or nervous.  So I immediately decide to play on the tube and have the pontoon drag us.  Part of it was to show everyone that I wasn't scared.  It was nothing.  Dust it off and continue playing.  I think it worked to some degree... but as I found out later, it backfired. SW was first one up... none of the other kids wanted to play after seeing what I went through.   But after seeing us have fun... one at a time, everyone started playing.  And even some of the adults got into the action!! WOOHOO!!   

I finally got into the boat... and someone told me... (I forget who).... your daughter is upset.  It turns out NN was balling her eyes out.  She was worried sick with me not being able to get back on the boat.  And once I got on the boat... I didn't check in with the family and went straight out to the water.  Oops! My bad.  I tried apologizing...but she wasn't hearing it.  Woe is me....  I screwed up big time.

I finally got in the boat... and was freezing my @$$ off.  I changed... put on new clothes... but the wind chill was still killing me.  Ah wellz... I had to man up and take it and not show signs of weakness.  We finally got back to the pier, parked, and changed.  Everything was calmer now... and the last thing I had to worry about... a missing iPhone that turned up in lost and found.  Boom... time to head back to camp for a night of camp life and chill.  

Tahoe Camping Day 1

"We got the full camping experience in 1 day." said NN.  

A full experience indeed.  We headed up to Tahoe on Friday morning and on our way... we stopped by Castro Valley and had brunch with 大恩人-嫻姨。 She dressed soooo nice... as if she's going to a wedding.   After Dim Sum, great company, great conversation... we took off for our final destination.

We skipped through the backroads and made it Tahoe.  Upon entering the campground... the ranger warned us to leave our doors unlocked.  Let the bears get in vs getting your door smashed in.  And consider keeping the doors open because if bears show up, you won't have time to fish for keys.  Just run into the car and close the doors - quick.  We thought he was joking... until we find out he wasn't. 

We got to our site.. and met the Yu's there, easily one of our closest church friends.  They helped us pitch our tent and set up camp.  Then we headed out for dinner.  We got back after dinner and it was dark already... enough for us to start our camp fire which wasn't easy at all!! All those years of watching Survivor paid off. You start with the fuse on the bottom (pine needles) with dried pine cones sitting on top to fuel the flame, and eventually, the $12 firewood we got from the general store.  A little later in the evening, our other closest church friends, the Tats, showed up.  Someone took their campsite, but thankfully, another family overbooked and gave them theirs.  We helped them set up camp and by then... the kids had their smores and it was bedtime.

Bedtime was horrible.  Our neighbors were loud.  It was cold.  It was uncomfortable.  And by the wee hours of the night... it got freezing cold, especially the head which was exposed.  Luckily, I was wearing a hoodie, so I was able to cover my head and we had a throw.  I got maybe 2-3 hours of shuteye and after falling in and out of sleep... the sky was lit up and it was too bright to sleep anymore, especially with nature's alarm clock, the bugs and birds in the wild screaming their heads off.  Time for Day 2....

Breaking the Bamboo Ceiling

Was invited to be a panelist at my work's Asian American Professional Society to speak on the topic "Breaking the Bamboo Ceiling" which is coined after the book published by Jane Hyun. 

I spent a couple days thinking about what I would say... how I would say it.  There's the business environment thing to say.  There's the ethical thing to say.  There's the hot-take thing to say.  And there's also the brutal, honest truth that's hard to say... but can't be left unsaid.

Some of the brutal soundbites

• 5000 years of civilization... there's a lot of pride... and a lot of fallouts and I quote, "as you can see with some of the geopolitical happenings"
• It's hindered me because I was raised to put my head down, work hard, and not rock the boat... that doesn't work in modern corporate America
• I brought attention to some of my personal heroes that's reshaped my upbringing... MLK, Rosa Parks, Jackie Robinson....
• I talked about the intersection / collision of upbringing and MTV/Nickelodeon culture
• I dropped "fearfully and wonderfully made..." to which I got a PM from an audience member - "appreciate you quoting Psalm 139:14" 
• When asked, I admitted to shivering every time ppl mention Chinese spies... and I'm self-conscious enough to look around to see if anyone is staring at me
• I drew on the fact that our ELT and Csuite has evolved over the last 10 years... it will continue to evolve... and the call to action is... someone in the audience needs to be the first AAPI to sit in one of those spots

And lastly.. I threw out my hot take for the day when asked specifically on how to break the bamboo ceiling.  I said, 

"Don't.  Don't break it.  The tensile strength of bamboo is greater than metal.  Instead.. navigate through it.  Remodel with it.  Use it as a stepping stone (stick?) for your next endeavor.  What I meant to say was...the ceiling is there for a purpose.  It represents your past and who you are.  Don't break or shatter it.  Embrace it. Own it. And shape it where you want to go next."

Cathartic

Started to clean up my Whatsapp chat groups by archiving every group text or individual text of people that I haven't texted... or because of my exodus... will likely not text in the near future.  One after another.  A working group.  A planning committee.  A project.  And then individuals... who outside of church... I don't think I'll ever contact.  Swipe left... swipe left... more swiping left.  Boom boom boom.... cleaned up my list of chats.  It's now so empty... but so clean!! 

Twenty years later...

Twenty years ago... when we weren't married yet... when I still lived in a little apartment... I was invited to Anderson's baptism.  And after that... it set off 20 years at SJCAC.  20 years later... we officially move on.... 

If I were to list out my SJCAC passport:

• baptism by water
• baptism by Holy Spirit
• lead bible study
• serve in Tutoring ministry
• serve in ESL ministry
• serve in VBS
• home group leader
• home group co-parent
• serve as usher
• serve as communion steward
• college outreach
• serve in nursery
• supermarket outreach
• teach Children's Sunday School
• teach Adult Sunday School
• lead Wednesday prayer meeting
• lead morning TWA
• run AV during worship
• lead worship 
• serve on worship team
• translate sermon on stage from English to Chinese
• translate sermon on stage from Chinese to English
• translate sermon over headsets
• translate on stage for Mission Conference
• lead people to Jesus
• attend church retreat
• lead and organize church retreats
• serve as 團長
• serve as MA
• MC just about every major and minor event
• move chairs and vacuum sanctuary / 擔擔抬抬
• cooked and cleaned  

I've been Mary.  I've been Martha.  Not waiting in line to be Lazarus... 

I think the only major item I haven't checked off is serve in Youth Ministry.  Not sure why that's been so elusive.  And never gone on a Short Term Mission.  Hrmm... 

But after 20 years... after my last turn banging on the drums... it's official.  We're moving from CS and over to NV.  It's not like we're leaving SJCAC... at least I don't feel that way.  Still Christ's church.  Still Christ's family.  And then the obvious.... 

Twenty years later....?

Has it been that long??? 20 years... I think it has.  It was before the kids for sure.  And it was probably around or before the time we got married.  20 years!  Wow.... 20 years since I've put on my cleats... came to the plate... and stared down the pitcher.  20 years since I've slipped on the piece of leather and picked up a roller and shot it to first.  20 years since I've stepped foot on a diamond. 

We won my inaugural softball game... as I emerged from retirement.  Though... I never really retired.  I just took on a second career.  

Strangely enough... I felt pretty at home.  Both teams were from church.  I knew about 80% of them... or recognized them.  There were some great players.  There were some average players.  And a handful of beginners.  I didn't have a batting glove.... was wearing soccer cleats... had a $30 bat when everyone else used $150-$300 bats.  But when I came up to bat... everyone, including the OF took a few steps back.  HA!!  I'm not a power hitter... I can barely swing for contact.

I asked to play SS or 3B cuz I don't have the depth perception.  I'm not good... nor do I have the range.  But I still have one heckuva arm.  During warm ups.... had to get use to the infield bounce.  And during the game... made a couple of errors.  Most likely due to nerves.  But also made a couple of heads up plays and including that amazing backhanded snag.  

Too bad there were no lights at the field.  There's nothing like a summer evening... as the bugs are buzzing away on the pitchers mound... the wives are yapping away.... and children are giggling on the side... and world is alive with the murmurs of.... "Plaaaaaaayyyyyy baaaaaallllllllll." 

Gonna feel it tomorrow.  Over strenuated in all sorts of ways.  But pain never felt so good.