Celebration of Life.... then a celebration of my life

Flew out to Denver for Juli's celebration of life.  And it was indeed a celebration... a little bit of tears, but they were, shall I say, happy tears.  Tears of grieving because we miss her.  Tears of sadness because we can't process the "why."  Tears of realization of how big an impact one can make on another's life.  The service wasn't particularly long or drawn out... and I actually expected more to attend, notably missing were friends and family of the kids. (Interesting side note.  But nothing of substance.). 

Thank you Juli, for the footprint you have left in my life.

Then that night... I had a celebration of my own life. One of my direct reports invited me to go white water rafting.  I hesitated a little... but said yes.  Almost regretting it... because water and I just don't mix.  As the day drew near... I got to thinking... if there's no life jacket.  I'm out.  If there's anything fishy.  I'm out.  If I'm at all uncomfortable... I'm out. 

Driving up to the starting point... we were side by side with the river.  And it wasn't no Level 3 Cache River.  This was easily a Class 4-5!! The river... was white!!!  Then as we drove... I got to hear that my DC's brother (the guide), qualified for the Olympic trials.  And when we got to our launching point, I saw a bunch of kids come off their 6-person rafts... and a bunch of middle aged professionals board their rafts.  So the river was "safe."  The gear was all there... including a full on wet suit.  So I shut down that voice inside my head and went with it.

Boy was I glad I did!!! Had so much fun.  Made a fool of myself.  I told the guys, "I've got 20 years on you!" but they didn't mind.  Almost fell out the raft a couple of times... but my DC grabbed me just in time.  And the scenery was epicly beautiful.  I can see why people would want to do this every day for the rest of their lives.

Definitely worth celebrating.

Hog island

Been a while since I hung out with mom... so decided to take her out to lunch.  I tried to find a nicer place, a different experience.  It's not always about the food... right? Picked Hog Island at the Ferry Building.  I figure there's enough to sample where SOMETHING's gonna hit. 

It was a short wait...and we ended up sitting at one of the bar tables.  It was private and quiet.  The food was delish for a tourist trap. 

 Only bad thing was the $108 beef jerky I had to eat...cuz the stupid parking app didn't work!! By the time I paid for parking.. it was already too late.  I think there's AI in those parking meters that alert metermaids when to come ticket you.  Pretty soon... you won't even need meter maids.  If you're parked and not paid... you'll get ticketed. 

Humble Bumble

 Two months after my highest high of crushing the Pecha Kucha... I was asked to present it to the Executive Leadership Team by my VP.  He meant well... to get me out in front of senior leaders.  And he was trying to showcase some of this organization's contributions.  But as the day drew near... the number of attendees started to dwindle.  From 15-20... down to 10... down to 4... down to 2.  Really, it was 1, because my VP heard it already. 

And I so royally bombed. 

Not my fault.  

It was the worst of worse situation... to a point where the one person audience harnessed all his politeness.. listened... got up... and left.  My VP felt so bad he texted me and apologized.  

I had a feeling this was gonna happen and it really is no hair off my back.  But still... doesn't feel good to be humbled this way.  

That phone call...

Was wrapping up a meeting and HR called.  They never call... they IM you first.  Something was up.

After an afternoon of swirl with some assumptions and expectations... Got another call.  This time during dinner and on my personal cell.  This time instead of HR, was my VP.  

"I've got some bad news to deliver."  

(No.  No no no!! Don't say it.)

"XXXXX has past away."

(NO!!!! This can't be real!!!!). 

In my mind... I thought that person may have had a stroke... maybe a mild heart attack.  Something that happens when you're around your late 40's / early 50's... and it just happens.  But you get better after a health scare and things get back to normal.

I was shocked.  

Just last week.. we were in meetings together.  We broke bread.  We even went out to dinner to talk about vacation... kids... life outside of work.  Ironically... this person even mentioned that their heart rate has been going up and needed to check it out.

I was shocked.  I didn't know how to act.  Gave my family a hug.  Cherish who I have.  I knelt down... said a prayer for the family.  Who knows what they're going through.

Then I texted my colleagues and friends, telling them if they want to talk, I'm here to listen.

Then I went for a walk.  I needed to "do something."  And about 0.25 mile into my walk... I looked up at the blue sky.  And uncontrollably uttered the words, "Thanks, XXXXX."  

Will wait till more details to come while continuing to process.

More Nola

 Went to Nathan's... very salty. I think I'll pass next time. 

Back to NOLA

 After about 3 months... I finally make it back to New Orleans.  The flight was.... odd.

Sat in front of a family with a young toddler and a newborn.  I was kinda glad that it was me.  I wouldn't have minded any noise or crying.  Let me bear that cross.

Ironically... another dad sat next to me.  I know he was a dad cuz I saw his wall paper on his phone.  As we started to roll to take off... the todder behind the middle seat started kicking the chair.  Uncontrollably.  I thought, "The parents will do something, right?" But they didn't.  Didn't hear a peep.  And the kicking continued.  Not sure what I would've done... even as patient as I am... I don't know if I can stand constant kicking of the chair.  And the dude finally said, in an annoyed yet polite way, "Can you please stop the kicking? Thank you."  

Not bad.  Forceful, but had the decency to say "please" and "thank you."  I know parents can't control everything... but that was definitely something they could've controlled.  

Then as we landed.... the lady and the toddler got up and crowded in the aisle way.  They were rarin' to get out of the plane.  Slowly... the people in front of us got up row by row... left then right.  And the mom and the toddler showed NO SIGNS of yielding.  The same dad whispered, somewhat loudly, to me, "So much for airplane etiquette."  I didn't know what to say.  Again... this was something the parents could control.  But it's a 2 year old that's been cramped up for 4.5 hours.  She wanted to stretch her legs.  I simply shrugged and said, "It's alright. Whatever."  

Then it got to the folks in front of us... the mom and toddler didn't even yield to them.  They sped and ran.  I slowly waited till they were done.  Then I wailed till the folks on the other side of the aisle got up and left.  Then I got up.... I looked at the dad who had the newborn in his hands.  His wife and daughter ditched them.  I told him, "Go ahead."  So he can catch up with this family.  And he so nobly said, "No.. it's ok.  You go."  And I replied... "No.. you go."  And he said, "Nah.. it's ok."  I didn't want to fight him and further delay our deboarding.  I guess the loud whisper worked.  But to what end????

Anyhoo... finally got to the car. Texted my colleague I won't join them for dinner and I made a stop at Pesces.  Ahhhh... home sweet home.  

Got the gumbo... which was extremely salty.  Will probably avoid it next time. 

The fried oysters and ground shrimp spicy pasta on the other hand... to die for!!!! 

And that's why I keep coming back.

Tough pill to swallow

 Day 2 of the Norcal Tournament…. And the boys were clearly hitting their stride.  They went back to their original rotation, with SW as setting and Rishab as middle.  We didn’t have any problems with the 1^st set of the 1^st match…. Playing a team that we’ve always played and never lost to.  We were up comfortably and needed one more point to win…. When SW decided to showboat (or play up) and served a topper to the top of the net.  Much to the dismay of all the parents, “Why!?!??!?!”  Luckily… that one little mishap didn’t turn into bad happenings.  We ended up beating Aspire Ninja handily… which goes to show how much the team has improved.

But in the finals of the Bronze bracket… after winning the 1^st set without breaking a set… everyone started fooling around.  The Coach played with the lineup to let other players play.  And after it went back and forth… back and forth… it started looking like this might not go our way.  One of the bystander parents even said, “Looks like this might go to 3.”  For some reason, we just couldn’t pull away.  Until… we finally did.  We were up by 3… and had all the momentum.  Then… one of the players decided to showboat, like SW did, and serve a topper.  His serve not only didn’t make it over the net… it actually hit one of our own players.  No worries.  We were still up by 2.  And then… things started unraveling.  One point after another… we kept messing up.  Simple, stupid mistakes.  The momentum… suddenly swung.  Even after a couple of couldn’t stop the avalanche.  23-25.  Lost the 2^nd set. 

No worries… we were clearly the better team.  We just need to hunker down and play like we played in the first set.  We got this.  For the 3^rd set… set went with our “3^rd set rotation – where we go 5:1.”  And within a blink of an eye… we were down 0-8.  Horrible passes.  Miscommunication between SW and the middle.  Ill-advised plays.  Everyone was just going the wrong way.  We eventually tied it at 11-11 and thinking… our experience can take us over the hill.  Not this time.  Not with the showboating.  Not with the series of bad and missed-calls from the refs.  The deck was stacked against us… the final score was 11-15.  One of the worst losses of this team’s history.  Almost as bad as being up 10-0 against MVVC and throwing it.  This was worst.  This was against a clearly worse team.  It was painful… it sucked…. And the boys had to wear it.  May it be a lesson learned in life… foot on the neck.  Strike first.  Strike hard. No mercy. 

End of an Era

 After 3 years of teaching ESL… I wrapped up… what is seemingly the last class I will ever teach.  At least the last class I’ll teach as a full time ESL teacher at SJCAC.  The traffic gets worse and worse.  And now that the kids aren’t serving in Tutoring… it makes it hard for me to go solo.  Add on the fact that Joyce has given me an unwritten quota of what I can do with my “spare” time… the time has come to invest in New Vine and no longer SJ. 

 I’ve always felt I had a knack for teaching.  With so many examples and role models in my life… I’ve tried to take the best from all the best… and then roll it together and make it my own.  I’ve had my own struggles.  I’ve tried things that made out like a lead balloon and fallen completely flat and failed.  But for every fail… I probably had over 10-20 wins.  Like how the Tuesday attendance were noticeably hire than the Thursday class.  Or how students flat out tell me they come because of me.  Or when one of the students I demoted tried to beg to stay… because in her broken English and my broken Spanish… she knew the difference in my teaching style. There will always be a special place in my heart for helping new immigrants.  How many angels have helped my family in the past… I long to be able to pay it forward and help someone else.  And perhaps… in some weird way… they too will end up helping someone else. 

 These past three years have been humbling, challenging, and rewarding.  I was able to serve together with N and SW… for a short time.  A lot of times, those 45 minute drives ended up being naps for them.  I can’t express the joy I have when I share a different bible verse each week… and see the students’ face light up when they feel the encouragement of God’s words.  I’ve been graced by the presence and efforts of many of the pillars of SJCAC.  Seeing how many of them have served in ESL for years if not decades… and they continue to bring it, week after week, year after year.  I am saddened to see some of our students come and go… some disappear because of jobs. But more recently, they disappear for other reasons. 

 I end ESL with the same bible verse that was come as an anthem for my time in this ministry… where I set my alarm to go off at 10:02PM every day… to pray the words of Luke 10:2.  “The harvest is plenty, but workers are few.”  How I long that there’ll be a surge and abundance of young adult teachers that will give up a weeknight to be part of this ministry… to be part of God’s vision. 

Crash and Burn

 Oh geez… easily one of the worst worship experience ever.  I blame myself for not practicing on my edrums at home.  I blame myself for not knowing 6/8.  I blame myself for trying to do too much.  I blame the lack of chemistry this team has with each other.  It was so bad… I couldn’t bring myself to listen to it again.  Let’s hope this is rock bottom.