Pecha Kucha

For our leadership offsite… a bunch of the L6’s had to deliver a Pecha Kucha of our campaigns… The literal translation in Japanese is “chit-chat” but in actuality, is a 6 minute 40 second presentation of 20 slides, 20 seconds each.  The point is to delivery it Ted Talk style to captivate the audience with a short attention span.  For 6 weeks… all of us struggled with it.  In reality, we procrastinated.  But as the date drew near… we started fessing up with our slides and our scripts.  Our dry runs were great.  It seemed like everyone was amped up and ready. 

Then the offsite came and it was showtime.  One at a time… the L6’s started presenting.  And one at a time.. they all fell flat.  I hate to criticize and nit-pick… but all of the Pecha Kucha’s were so boring.  All the L6’s stood behind the podium. They read from a script.  They were lecturing.  Really!??!?! This is the best we can offer?

Day 2 of the offsite rolled around and it was my turn.  In fact… the VP moved me up in the schedule cuz of a conflict.  No problem… I was the smartest person in the room..  at least for the next 6 minutes and 40 seconds on this particular topic.  And in normal me… I did a little warm up to break the ice.  Made a couple of jokes in my deadpan, semi-serious self.  Then I kicked off my speech with an opening question… the Hook.  Almost the entire room raised their hand.  I asked my first question.  Juli piped up and answered to which I said, “You’re ruining it, Juli!!”  (laughter).  And I was off.  The slides were somehow messed up.. .but I improvised.  Never did I hide behind the podium.  I started on the stage… then I walked off.  Started walking around the room to engage.  Stopping every now and then and parked.  One joke after another… it killed.  There were times I blanked… but I kept going.  No one knew.  No one was of the smarter.  Then it came to the end.  I was wrapping up… I circled the floor… got back on the stage.  That’s when I shamelessly plagiarized West Wing – the “Run into the Fire” speech. 

“We will do what is hard.  We will achieve what is great.  And we will not waste another minute looking for missing socks.” 

I didn’t even say “Thank you.”  Flashed my last slide and the room erupted into applauds – with even some folks giving me a standing ovation.  Did my team proud.  Did my boss proud. I can eat all the humble pie and modest cake… but without a doubt… in that moment in time… I was the King of the World.  

 

Of little patience

 NN had her Life Conference car wash fund raising and I dropped her in the morning… thinking I can get my car washed also.  I was the first car there… but they were still setting up on the basketball courts so I parked on the side and waited for the markers or traffic directors.  10 minutes before they opened for business…this lady drives onto the basketball court… going the opposite way I would’ve expected the car wash queue to go.  But the Youth Leaders didn’t correct her.  They started washing her car.  Pretty soon… a second car came.  And a third.  All facing… what I consider… the wrong direction.  Whatever…  they’ll regret it later.  Lemme get in line…. I was 4^th. 

 I brought my laptop with me and sat on the side to do work.  But after a long time of waiting… and seeing people who came after me already leaving… I got curious.  What was taking so long??? OMG…. What a friggin disaster.  No order.  No process.  No line.  Cars were now parked facing in two directions.  My car was not even touched.  There was one person spraying with water…. And about 10 youths who’ll jump onto soap the car.  Then those same 10 youth will walk over to dry the car.  Then they’ll vacuum the car.  So inefficient.  So impractical. 

 NN saw me… and told me that I should go to lunch and come back.  I looked at her in bewilderment.  No!! I got here 4^th… I should leave 4^th.  Her excuse was… some cars that came late have to leave.  Ok… we’re a Christian organization.  I get it that some people have a schedule to maintain… but still, how about maintain the integrity of order.  I made an audible gasp… and started talking loudly to people that were also waiting… saying how long I’ve waited.  I loudly say… “I don’t need to get it washed… I’ll just donate and leave.”  Making sure the other Youth Leaders heard me.  And making sure everyone knew I was annoyed.

 I was now standing there staring the Youth leader down.  Poor guy.  He was overwhelmed.  He was spraying cars down.  Moving cars out of the way.  Giving directions to his crew.  He bit off more than he can chew.  And with the 3^rd and 4^th car still sitting there… he walks over and starts spraying down a later coming mini-van.  The owner of the van was next to me…  and I lose it.   I call out to the other Youth Leader and say, “Can my car be next?”  Preposterous!!!

 After the wash… which I will say, was done fairly well… they still needed to vacuum.  NN said, “It’ll be another 45 minutes.” And she probably wasn’t wrong… so I told the Youth Leader… “I don’t need a vacuum.  Here’s my donation.  Thanks!!”  And I drove off and leave.  As I was leaving… I hear NN talk to that Youth leader within earshot… “My dad needs to have more patience.”   I was gonna get out of the car and make a scene…. But decided to swallow it and just let it be. 

 Patience my @$$.  This was utter buffoonery. 

 

The Chasm

 That chasm between me and SW is growing wide and fast… and it’s a tsunami that I simply can’t stop nor do I wish to weather. 

 After practice… NN wanted to go shopping at Valley Fair.  So we went for lunch and immediately after lunch, she pulls Joyce to go Mommy/Daughter shopping while I was left with SW.  I immediately got worried…. And pulled Joyce aside.  “What do I do with him??” I don’t like shopping… nor do I know how to shop for a teenage boy.  She said, “You guys can go home if you want.  Come pick us up later.”  I exhaled…. and took the opportunity to bond with my son.

 I had some high hopes… went from one store to another.  Tried pointing out interesting clothes for him to try.  Tried drawing remarks from him or things to discuss to which I was volleyed sarcasm or silence.  He seemed disinterested in every thing I wanted him to try.  Either I have no sense for fashion (possibly).  Or he has zero interest in shopping (maybe).  Or he simply doesn’t know how to pick clothes or accept clothes his dad picks for him.  And doesn’t know that he can go try-them-on and check himself out in the mirror.  Ugh… after about 4-5 stores, I got sick of the routine.  So I clammed up.  I told him to lead… and I’ll follow.  It got really icy.  He knew I was happy… but he didn’t want to rock the boat any further.  So he reluctantly walked around the mall a few more times.  We didn’t talk.  We didn’t joke.  It ended with him waving the white flag…. “I’m done.”  I mirrored his surrender and decided to find a place to simply sit and wait for the ladies.  

 We found these soft cushy chairs in the middle of the mall and sat down.  Both of us busted out our devices and tried to kill time.  I texted Joyce, “911 – don’t know how to shop with him.”  She aptly replied… “Bring him to me, I can take him.”  I was so despondent.  I’m the “fun” parent.  But I couldn’t find a way to connect with my son.  There use to be an Apple store and Microsoft store that can help us kill time.  But that was when he was younger… without his personal device.  There’s a Bowlero there…but we’re sick of arcades at this point.  So we just sat.  Sat.  Sat.  Sat.  Finally enough time passed where lunch wore away… and I said, “Let’s get some pretzels.” 

 Anything to break the monotony of sitting…. We walked to map and looked for Wetzel Pretzel.  Found it.  And I told him to lead.  We walked in circles for a good 10 minutes.  After the third time around the same section… I finally piped in.  “Do you even know where we’re going?!”  And that’s when the fun began.  We found another map…. And this map… for whatever reason… showed a different location for Wetzel.  I pulled out my phone and found a third location for Wetzel.  Ok… confirmed it still exists.  But where is it???

 SW proposed he’ll race me to it… and off he dashed.  No idea where he think he was going.  But I knew exactly where I was headed…. The same ol place it’s been the past 10-15 years.  I purposely walked slowly… to give him a chance to beat me.  After taking the long, scenic route… I arrived there.  But SW was no where to be found!!  5 more minutes passed and he finally called.  Apparently… he ran around the 2^nd floor twice and still couldn’t find it.  Ok… the laughter came back. The fun was back. 

 I guess deep down… he wants exactly what I want.  To have fun again.  But he also didn’t know how.  Poor guy… full fledge teenager.  Wanting to be Fonzie cool… but deep down… he’s still Richie Cunningham… looking for a thrill on that blueberry hill.  Sigh…

Dub or El

 Went to my first Warriors game at Chase for Jeff’s bday.  I wasn’t about to spend $100 on myself… but since it was his bday…I made an exception.  He actually proposed it… with the Warriors’ resurgence and so many come from behind last minute victories.  He wanted to hop on the bandwagon. The crowd was notably a lot more upper class than say, the Niners or Giants crowd.  And this part of the city… man!!!  What has happened to the city I grew up in????  And there’s, omg… free street parking that’s within walking distance.  Lakob did well with his planning.  Baer… not so much. Ironically… our first game there wasn’t a Dub… but a Dud.  Harrison Barnes hitting a last second 3 nonetheless.  Now our road to the post season just got so much harder.  Went to two games this season… and both times we lost.  Maybe I’m the bad luck charm.

長江後浪推前浪

 Siu Wah had a wonderful spring break... he's been looking forward to this day for months if not years.

We went for a run...and he raced me in the 100m and 400m.  He smoked me in both. I thought I might have a chance to beat him in a sprint... it wasn't even close. 

We got up to Reno... and he beat me in basketball 1v1.  He then destroyed me in pickleball... I had no way of returning his serves.  

We shot a round of golf... and though the verdict is still out cuz we both did just as bad... he claims he won.  I won't say he didn't.

And lastly... we were at the arcades and there was a machine that measured the speed of your pitch.  I always thought I had a mighty arm... but in fact... I can only throw at a top speed of 62 mph.  SW peaked at 63.

I don't know what else I can beat him at anymore.  Video games.  No chance.  Sports.  Not in a million years.  

It's a little sad... but in actuality... it's very well expected.  He's a full blown teenage boy that's flourishing with his friends, at school, in sports, at church.  I'm so proud of my little Siu Wah....