Went back to Monterey Church today... and the speaker started her closing prayer with, "Hey Dad..." Never heard that before. Hrm... it sounds blasphemous, and yet... that's probably how people felt when Jesus first uttered the words, "Our Father..."
Both kids were off to LIFE conference... so we took advantage of being Empty Nesters and skiddaddled down to Monterey/Carmel for the weekend.
The weekend actually started on July 4th... where we first went shopping at the now debunking and soon to be run down Great Mall. Geez...what happened to this place??? Seeing it was fruitless... we actually trekked up to Livermore Outlet and made a killing!! Wow that place has gone big and wide.
Saturday we turned south and hit up Carmel... walked through the shops.. .stopped by the beach and got food poisoning from a local restaurant. We first thought we weren't use to the freshness of the seafood... turns out... it was spoiled. Cuz I was sick the entire day the next day too.
Sunday morning... woke up early and grabbed a hotel bike and along the coastline for a nice ride. It was a beautiful ride and awesome scenery. And the weather was perfect... a little nippy but warmed up as my body started to warm up. We found the same church we went to a couple of years ago when we had an Empty Nest escapade... and spent the rest of the day walking through Cannery Row.
The ride home was a bit trafficky... but since we weren't in much of a hurry... it was just more time in the car listening to podcasts and what not. I can see myself doing more of these getwaways...
Flew out to Denver for Juli's celebration of life. And it was indeed a celebration... a little bit of tears, but they were, shall I say, happy tears. Tears of grieving because we miss her. Tears of sadness because we can't process the "why." Tears of realization of how big an impact one can make on another's life. The service wasn't particularly long or drawn out... and I actually expected more to attend, notably missing were friends and family of the kids. (Interesting side note. But nothing of substance.).
Thank you Juli, for the footprint you have left in my life.
Then that night... I had a celebration of my own life. One of my direct reports invited me to go white water rafting. I hesitated a little... but said yes. Almost regretting it... because water and I just don't mix. As the day drew near... I got to thinking... if there's no life jacket. I'm out. If there's anything fishy. I'm out. If I'm at all uncomfortable... I'm out.
Driving up to the starting point... we were side by side with the river. And it wasn't no Level 3 Cache River. This was easily a Class 4-5!! The river... was white!!! Then as we drove... I got to hear that my DC's brother (the guide), qualified for the Olympic trials. And when we got to our launching point, I saw a bunch of kids come off their 6-person rafts... and a bunch of middle aged professionals board their rafts. So the river was "safe." The gear was all there... including a full on wet suit. So I shut down that voice inside my head and went with it.
Boy was I glad I did!!! Had so much fun. Made a fool of myself. I told the guys, "I've got 20 years on you!" but they didn't mind. Almost fell out the raft a couple of times... but my DC grabbed me just in time. And the scenery was epicly beautiful. I can see why people would want to do this every day for the rest of their lives.
Definitely worth celebrating.
Two months after my highest high of crushing the Pecha Kucha... I was asked to present it to the Executive Leadership Team by my VP. He meant well... to get me out in front of senior leaders. And he was trying to showcase some of this organization's contributions. But as the day drew near... the number of attendees started to dwindle. From 15-20... down to 10... down to 4... down to 2. Really, it was 1, because my VP heard it already.
And I so royally bombed.
Not my fault.
It was the worst of worse situation... to a point where the one person audience harnessed all his politeness.. listened... got up... and left. My VP felt so bad he texted me and apologized.
I had a feeling this was gonna happen and it really is no hair off my back. But still... doesn't feel good to be humbled this way.
Was wrapping up a meeting and HR called. They never call... they IM you first. Something was up.
After an afternoon of swirl with some assumptions and expectations... Got another call. This time during dinner and on my personal cell. This time instead of HR, was my VP.
"I've got some bad news to deliver."
(No. No no no!! Don't say it.)
"XXXXX has past away."
(NO!!!! This can't be real!!!!).
In my mind... I thought that person may have had a stroke... maybe a mild heart attack. Something that happens when you're around your late 40's / early 50's... and it just happens. But you get better after a health scare and things get back to normal.
I was shocked.
Just last week.. we were in meetings together. We broke bread. We even went out to dinner to talk about vacation... kids... life outside of work. Ironically... this person even mentioned that their heart rate has been going up and needed to check it out.
I was shocked. I didn't know how to act. Gave my family a hug. Cherish who I have. I knelt down... said a prayer for the family. Who knows what they're going through.
Then I texted my colleagues and friends, telling them if they want to talk, I'm here to listen.
Then I went for a walk. I needed to "do something." And about 0.25 mile into my walk... I looked up at the blue sky. And uncontrollably uttered the words, "Thanks, XXXXX."
Will wait till more details to come while continuing to process.
After about 3 months... I finally make it back to New Orleans. The flight was.... odd.
Sat in front of a family with a young toddler and a newborn. I was kinda glad that it was me. I wouldn't have minded any noise or crying. Let me bear that cross.
Ironically... another dad sat next to me. I know he was a dad cuz I saw his wall paper on his phone. As we started to roll to take off... the todder behind the middle seat started kicking the chair. Uncontrollably. I thought, "The parents will do something, right?" But they didn't. Didn't hear a peep. And the kicking continued. Not sure what I would've done... even as patient as I am... I don't know if I can stand constant kicking of the chair. And the dude finally said, in an annoyed yet polite way, "Can you please stop the kicking? Thank you."
Not bad. Forceful, but had the decency to say "please" and "thank you." I know parents can't control everything... but that was definitely something they could've controlled.
Then as we landed.... the lady and the toddler got up and crowded in the aisle way. They were rarin' to get out of the plane. Slowly... the people in front of us got up row by row... left then right. And the mom and the toddler showed NO SIGNS of yielding. The same dad whispered, somewhat loudly, to me, "So much for airplane etiquette." I didn't know what to say. Again... this was something the parents could control. But it's a 2 year old that's been cramped up for 4.5 hours. She wanted to stretch her legs. I simply shrugged and said, "It's alright. Whatever."
Then it got to the folks in front of us... the mom and toddler didn't even yield to them. They sped and ran. I slowly waited till they were done. Then I wailed till the folks on the other side of the aisle got up and left. Then I got up.... I looked at the dad who had the newborn in his hands. His wife and daughter ditched them. I told him, "Go ahead." So he can catch up with this family. And he so nobly said, "No.. it's ok. You go." And I replied... "No.. you go." And he said, "Nah.. it's ok." I didn't want to fight him and further delay our deboarding. I guess the loud whisper worked. But to what end????
Anyhoo... finally got to the car. Texted my colleague I won't join them for dinner and I made a stop at Pesces. Ahhhh... home sweet home.
Got the gumbo... which was extremely salty. Will probably avoid it next time.
Day 2 of the Norcal Tournament…. And the boys were clearly hitting their stride. They went back to their original rotation, with SW as setting and Rishab as middle. We didn’t have any problems with the 1st set of the 1st match…. Playing a team that we’ve always played and never lost to. We were up comfortably and needed one more point to win…. When SW decided to showboat (or play up) and served a topper to the top of the net. Much to the dismay of all the parents, “Why!?!??!?!” Luckily… that one little mishap didn’t turn into bad happenings. We ended up beating Aspire Ninja handily… which goes to show how much the team has improved.
But in the finals of the Bronze bracket… after winning the 1st set
without breaking a set… everyone started fooling around. The Coach played with the lineup to let other
players play. And after it went back and
forth… back and forth… it started looking like this might not go our way. One of the bystander parents even said, “Looks
like this might go to 3.” For some
reason, we just couldn’t pull away.
Until… we finally did. We were up
by 3… and had all the momentum. Then…
one of the players decided to showboat, like SW did, and serve a topper. His serve not only didn’t make it over the
net… it actually hit one of our own players.
No worries. We were still up by
2. And then… things started
unraveling. One point after another… we
kept messing up. Simple, stupid
mistakes. The momentum… suddenly
swung. Even after a couple of couldn’t
stop the avalanche. 23-25. Lost the 2nd set.
No worries… we were clearly the better team. We just need to hunker down and play like we played in the first set. We got this. For the 3rd set… set went with our “3rd set rotation – where we go 5:1.” And within a blink of an eye… we were down 0-8. Horrible passes. Miscommunication between SW and the middle. Ill-advised plays. Everyone was just going the wrong way. We eventually tied it at 11-11 and thinking… our experience can take us over the hill. Not this time. Not with the showboating. Not with the series of bad and missed-calls from the refs. The deck was stacked against us… the final score was 11-15. One of the worst losses of this team’s history. Almost as bad as being up 10-0 against MVVC and throwing it. This was worst. This was against a clearly worse team. It was painful… it sucked…. And the boys had to wear it. May it be a lesson learned in life… foot on the neck. Strike first. Strike hard. No mercy.
After 3 years of teaching ESL… I wrapped up… what is seemingly the last class I will ever teach. At least the last class I’ll teach as a full time ESL teacher at SJCAC. The traffic gets worse and worse. And now that the kids aren’t serving in Tutoring… it makes it hard for me to go solo. Add on the fact that Joyce has given me an unwritten quota of what I can do with my “spare” time… the time has come to invest in New Vine and no longer SJ.
These past three years have been humbling, challenging, and rewarding. I was able to serve together with N and SW… for a short time. A lot of times, those 45 minute drives ended up being naps for them. I can’t express the joy I have when I share a different bible verse each week… and see the students’ face light up when they feel the encouragement of God’s words. I’ve been graced by the presence and efforts of many of the pillars of SJCAC. Seeing how many of them have served in ESL for years if not decades… and they continue to bring it, week after week, year after year. I am saddened to see some of our students come and go… some disappear because of jobs. But more recently, they disappear for other reasons.
Oh geez… easily one of the worst worship experience ever. I blame myself for not practicing on my edrums at home. I blame myself for not knowing 6/8. I blame myself for trying to do too much. I blame the lack of chemistry this team has with each other. It was so bad… I couldn’t bring myself to listen to it again. Let’s hope this is rock bottom.
SW's team scrimmaged UVA today and he opted to play lib. It was.... new.
He has the instincts but not the skills. He knows where to go but not what to do. He knows the basics but doesn't have the experience. It simply doesn't fit.
His teammate that took over setting. Same way.
The team did not do well, overall.
Parents are asking... "Why isn't SW setting?"
One of the perks of going to King’s is getting done with school earlier than most. Last year, we went camping at Tahoe with the Tat’s and Yu’s. I still have the bug from being outdoors, but knowing the family aren’t quite the outdoorsy type… decided to try glamping. I typed in Grok, “Best Bay Area glamping” and was recommended to go to Wildhaven Sonoma. A short 2 hour drive… with a fully furnished cabin with AC, heater, power, queen sized mattressed bed… community shower with hot water, propane grills, and individual camp fires. There was also a private access to the Russian River – which we didn’t take advantage of.
We got this TV about a year before NN was
born. It was a deal… one of the last TV’s
Toshiba made. When I bought it from Best
Buy… I did my research to a point where I drove up… found the sales man… and
said, “I want this.” I still remember
him saying, “Wow… you know what you want, don’t ya?” 17+ years later… we finally have to bid
farewell to old faithful. It started
kibutzing about 6-7 years ago. Then
about 3 years ago… it went out on us once.
We went to Costco to get a replacement… and upon coming home… plugged it
in one last time to check before tossing it.
And amazingly…it came back to life.
The kids were so disappointed!!!
This time, we weren’t as lucky.
With TV’s having an estimated lifespan of 5-7 years…. Our TV lasted 3
times that. We got our money’s worth.
As we went to Costco… it was thrilling being able to grab, not a shopping cart, but a little flatbed. And as we wheeled the TV through the crowds… we can sense the eyes of envy staring at us. It was just a simple 55” OLED. I bet some of the eyes were mocking at us… laughing for not buying a bigger TV. It’s ok… this is a temporary TV until we move into a better home with a living room fit for a nicer TV. Like the Toshiba… I look forward to this being another 15-17 year temporary TV.
One of my direct reports recently made manager… and he’s enrolled in a Front Line Leader course. One of the assignment he has is to solicit comments from his team and peers. Then process and digest the comments and create some sort of action plan. I remember doing something like this when I first made Sr. Manager… and it was so natural for me to build a presentation that walked my boss through everything. Was I wrong in expecting him to do the same? Not only did he not do the same… he was completely unprepared. Was opening files left and right… pulling up empty PDF’s… moving files from one screen to another. 10 minutes into his presentation… I did what I’ve never done before. I stopped his presentation. I flat out told him… this is out of character. He’s unprepared and this is not professional. He’s wasting my time and wasting his own time. After pulling a rug out from him.. I threw him a life jacket and said, “Run it back and we can do this again.”
Annual dance showcase… and once again… NN’s class dominated. There’s good… and there’s not so good. And then, there’s simply great. NN has always stood out as a dancer. Ever since she was dancing for Arrows in the Christmas Performances, her natural abilities outshone her peers. Throughout the years at TKA… her class would somehow end up with the best numbers. This year was no exception. And even in an off year… where I think the dance teacher is out of ideas or low on creative juice or distracted. NN… ever having a chip on her shoulder for being overlooked or typecasted as the smaller, cute Asian, was given some major prominent roles this time. NN sometimes wonders… how far she would go had we put her in formal training. Forget regrets… or life is yours to miss.
Day 2 of NN’s last tournament of the season (that she can attend). She already missed day 1 cuz of her AP exam. I hinted we can avoid the 2 hour drive… but she insisted. I had a bunch of podcasts and songs prepared. And then… we started talking and talking and talking some more. She threw out memes about Trump and the Trade Wars, but everything she said lacked critical thinking of research. I started explaining to her some of the math and data behind what was happening. She was flabbergasted at how the world is shaped… how unfair the world is. The talk then moved to relationships… family history… I gave her my view of recycling. My pet peeves. My view of church and religion. At times, she got upset at me for making a hot take and being argumentative. I didn’t take the bait… I simply explained how I can easily argue the other way, and probably win the argument. But the point wasn’t to win… but to understand all sides… and make an informed decision, instead of believing what social media tells you in an IG short. After a frustrating day on the courts… we grabbed a quick bite… picked up a Dutch Bros… and started on a 2 hour drive home. And once again… we talked, talked, talked. Didn’t even need to play any of the podcasts.
NN had her AP mock exam… so SW and I went over to shoot some hoops before picking up NN. Last time… he went a little too far and trash talked a little too much. This time, it was a lot friendlier. We both won 1 game… could’ve played a third, rubber match. But decided it to call it… and head over to 7-eleven to grab a slurpee. It’s been a little rough since the mall incident and I wasn’t sure what we can talk about. I decided to do a little “performance review” with him… asking him about his greatest strengths and biggest areas for improvement. He must’ve been sensing the same tension because he answered without the usual sarcasm. I was floored. Then I went one step further… I asked him to rate me. What are my great strengths and my areas of improvement.
Strengths: I’m well connected. I can get things done. I also have drive. I will get things done.
Areas of Improvement: be more modest. Some times, I’m wrong… and I refuse to admit
it.
I thanked him for his honesty. I think… as father and son… we’ve moved onto a new level of closeness.
After Jeff’s bday lunch… and NN’s volleyball season wrapping up… had the sudden realization it was Mark’s bday. And maybe it’s time for a get together. We met up at good ol St. John’s. Short and Stubbs haven’t changed. If anything… he lost whatever weight he gained the last time we hung out. Mel noticeably got a bit more… tired. Anderson is Anderson. Long gone are repeating the same jokes… replaced with conversations centered around aging parents and growing kids. How did 30 years pass by so fast?
Came home in time for SW’s 14th birthday… and longing to do anything to please the kids these days, I threw the idea of out of watching a sneak preview showing of Thunderbolts… an MCU movie that SW was supposedly interested in. The 8PM showing was already sold out… so we opted for the 9PM showing. With a two hour run time… three days of traveling… a dark room… a full, hearty dinner… it was the perfect formula for a nice $18 nap. $36 if you count Joyce’s nap. The kids loved the movie though… and really… that’s all that matters.
Happy Birthday SW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
For our leadership offsite… a bunch of the L6’s had to deliver a Pecha Kucha of our campaigns… The literal translation in Japanese is “chit-chat” but in actuality, is a 6 minute 40 second presentation of 20 slides, 20 seconds each. The point is to delivery it Ted Talk style to captivate the audience with a short attention span. For 6 weeks… all of us struggled with it. In reality, we procrastinated. But as the date drew near… we started fessing up with our slides and our scripts. Our dry runs were great. It seemed like everyone was amped up and ready.
Then the offsite came and it was showtime. One at a time… the L6’s started presenting. And one at a time.. they all fell flat. I hate to criticize and nit-pick… but all of the Pecha Kucha’s were so boring. All the L6’s stood behind the podium. They read from a script. They were lecturing. Really!??!?! This is the best we can offer?
Day 2 of the offsite rolled around and it was my turn. In fact… the VP moved me up in the schedule cuz of a conflict. No problem… I was the smartest person in the room.. at least for the next 6 minutes and 40 seconds on this particular topic. And in normal me… I did a little warm up to break the ice. Made a couple of jokes in my deadpan, semi-serious self. Then I kicked off my speech with an opening question… the Hook. Almost the entire room raised their hand. I asked my first question. Juli piped up and answered to which I said, “You’re ruining it, Juli!!” (laughter). And I was off. The slides were somehow messed up.. .but I improvised. Never did I hide behind the podium. I started on the stage… then I walked off. Started walking around the room to engage. Stopping every now and then and parked. One joke after another… it killed. There were times I blanked… but I kept going. No one knew. No one was of the smarter. Then it came to the end. I was wrapping up… I circled the floor… got back on the stage. That’s when I shamelessly plagiarized West Wing – the “Run into the Fire” speech.
“We will do what is hard. We will achieve what is great. And we will not waste another minute looking for missing socks.”
I didn’t even say “Thank you.” Flashed my last slide and the room erupted into applauds – with even some folks giving me a standing ovation. Did my team proud. Did my boss proud. I can eat all the humble pie and modest cake… but without a doubt… in that moment in time… I was the King of the World.
NN had her Life Conference car wash fund raising and I dropped her in the morning… thinking I can get my car washed also. I was the first car there… but they were still setting up on the basketball courts so I parked on the side and waited for the markers or traffic directors. 10 minutes before they opened for business…this lady drives onto the basketball court… going the opposite way I would’ve expected the car wash queue to go. But the Youth Leaders didn’t correct her. They started washing her car. Pretty soon… a second car came. And a third. All facing… what I consider… the wrong direction. Whatever… they’ll regret it later. Lemme get in line…. I was 4th.
That chasm between me and SW is growing wide and fast… and it’s a tsunami that I simply can’t stop nor do I wish to weather.
Went to my first Warriors game at Chase for Jeff’s bday. I wasn’t about to spend $100 on myself… but since it was his bday…I made an exception. He actually proposed it… with the Warriors’ resurgence and so many come from behind last minute victories. He wanted to hop on the bandwagon. The crowd was notably a lot more upper class than say, the Niners or Giants crowd. And this part of the city… man!!! What has happened to the city I grew up in???? And there’s, omg… free street parking that’s within walking distance. Lakob did well with his planning. Baer… not so much. Ironically… our first game there wasn’t a Dub… but a Dud. Harrison Barnes hitting a last second 3 nonetheless. Now our road to the post season just got so much harder. Went to two games this season… and both times we lost. Maybe I’m the bad luck charm.
Siu Wah had a wonderful spring break... he's been looking forward to this day for months if not years.
We went for a run...and he raced me in the 100m and 400m. He smoked me in both. I thought I might have a chance to beat him in a sprint... it wasn't even close.
We got up to Reno... and he beat me in basketball 1v1. He then destroyed me in pickleball... I had no way of returning his serves.
We shot a round of golf... and though the verdict is still out cuz we both did just as bad... he claims he won. I won't say he didn't.
And lastly... we were at the arcades and there was a machine that measured the speed of your pitch. I always thought I had a mighty arm... but in fact... I can only throw at a top speed of 62 mph. SW peaked at 63.
I don't know what else I can beat him at anymore. Video games. No chance. Sports. Not in a million years.
It's a little sad... but in actuality... it's very well expected. He's a full blown teenage boy that's flourishing with his friends, at school, in sports, at church. I'm so proud of my little Siu Wah....
Got a text from NN... "Tornado and flood warnings."
Then another text... "We're stuck!"
Followed by... "We got Dutch Bros."
I sorta kinda made light of the situation. When I caught up with the news... little did I know how dangerous the situation actually was. Flash flooding all over southern Texas with the heart of the storm being about 40 minutes away from where they stayed.
Her description, upon returning, was much more doom and gloom than, "We got Dutch Bros." which at the time... made us think everything was fine and dandy. Fish-tailing. Hydro-planing. Going 10 mph. Sheet of white on the windshield. Seeking cover at a Canes. Finally.. taking sanctuary at a Costco.
When you send your kids out to the real world... let alone the Mission field... you gotta be prepared be for anything and trust in the Lord for everything.
God bless our brothers and sisters that were at Mynamar this past week.
Teenagers are hard to talk to. You try to engage in decent conversation by not asking Yes / No questions. And even if you try and ask questions like “How was school?” It’ll be quick answers like, “Good.” Or “Fine.” Or “It was Ok.”
Then you get into the Why? And there comes the all powerful, “Why not?”
It’s a seemingly simple answer that pretends
to be engaging. But in fact… it’s a
rude, slap in the face remark where all it does is throw the question back at
the initiator with zero response other than a tsunami of, let’s change the
subject. It’s a sure sign of shutting off any desire to continue
a conversation. A proverbial slamming of
the door. And taken the wrong way… but
really the only way… stop bothering me.
It's finally come to pass - my day of reckoning, day of awakening, day of.... fill in the blank.
Last week was a topsey turvey week... what do I mean by that??
On Monday... I had a presentation to the VP and his direct reports. I crushed it. To the point where the VP said, "that's the best XYZ presentation I've ever heard." And multiple Directors complimenting me on a job well done. I just did my job.
Then on Thursday... things got heated in a meeting where I slammed the table with a Director. "WTF are you talking about?!?!?" I laid it all on the table. The entire mood in the meeting was shook. That became the most lively and most participated meeting in my 3 years in this job. The Director pseudo apologized afterwards and I was like... "the heck with you!!!" Everyone was clamoring to talk to me aftewards to which I said... "I've got your back, through thick and thin."
From the highest of highs to the lowest of lows... I have to realize... I am a steward of my Lord. I represent my faith. And I may be... the only bible that anyone reads. God bless me.
After a 10 month hiatus… I’m back drumming on a worship team. But to make it so much more special… serving alongside me as a vocalist is my Nui Nui Ju.
There were some kinks… NGL… we had 40 minutes of practice and I was so raw… especially the third 6/8 song where during practice, I was completely lost. But thankfully… it all came together in time for a wonderful, spiritful worship session.
Thank you Jesus!!!
We'd set this appointment long before we finally caught Mickey. And they contractors finally showed up. The came one time to scope the scene of the crime and give a quote. Then they came back performed major containment. Stuffing and blocking pipes, crevices. Created fencing for the little gaps under the garage door, even going into the crawl space to block off any possible entrance or exits to the outside world. They went far and deep.
In the crawl space... they said there was rat droppings everywhere. Who knows how long Mickey has been living down there. We had food. And they found a leaky pipe. So he had water. Let's hope this is the last time I post about this topic.
