Pastor Ted knew it... he knew I was gonna get choked up. On stage. In front of everyone. But he did it anyways. I've heard his testimony a thousand times. And on the thousand and first time... it still tore me apart. I was a mess that entire morning. Then when my emotions finally settled down...
The Niners blew it. I got so pissed. To a point where even when my kids came to console me and hug me... I sent them away. To a point where... I had to take a walk outside... only to punch a wooden column and bruise my knuckles. So stupid of me.
And yet.. .that's who I am. I hate it sometimes, how I literally where my emotions on my sleeves. I wish I can be more stoic sometimes. Wish I didn't have that big of a heart.
Oh.... to feel.
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