走錯成功路 - Week 1

With everything that happened... that came together... that fell apart.  The one thing that stands out among all (for me)... Joyce did translation.  Imagine that.  I can't.  God is good.  God is amazing.  I'm soooo in love.

大家姐

Once again... I'm butting heads with 大家姐 when planning church events.  We're cordial and profession and absolutely respectful -- all for the Kingdom of the God.  Then it came to an abrupt moment of realization.

Saturday afternoon I showed up at church and I see her there sitting alone at a foldout table in front a make-shift office (really a broom closet).  She's accepting tuition and running her Chinese school -- all by herself.  No help.  No team.  No 同路人.

I walk up and probably say the last thing anyone should've have said... and then she covers her face and starts to weep.

"Why am I so dumb?? Sitting her on a Saturday afternoon by myself?? Why???"

I didn't know what to do... but sit by my dear Sister-in-Christ and say, matter of factly... "because you are crazy... crazy of Jesus."

大家姐... RESPECT.

Pumpkin Spiced "Naughty"

一年一度嘅秋季離到, 就係Pumpkin Spiced Latte (PSL) 出現嘅時候。
今日出奇地去到星巴克飲咗一啖 PSL, 覺得南瓜味唔夠, 叫barista哥哥整個杯。等左成年都為咗呢幾個禮拜。點可以出錯呢？

入口, 非常之和美, 非常之滿足. 結局同上幾次一模一樣 - 屙到七彩。屙到"fee-lee-feh-leh." 若然可以, 屙到黃膽水都屙埋出嚟。條大腸有咁乾淨得咁乾淨，全靠一杯 PSL。可以開個口號

"若然便秘, 飲杯Lah-Tay!"

咁仲飲唔飲???  當然飲啦!!!  飲到抑鈪拿鐵出現為止!

Garlic Bread

I'm usually very careful... but today I failed.  I ended up buying Sourdough garlic bread instead of French bread garlic bread for dinner. D'oh!! 

Why is something sour anyways??? Geez....

我係死八公

I don't like staying after school and mingling with the moms.  But I guess there's a reason why I do.... man.  The stuff you hear!! The stuff you learn!!  Wonder what else I've been missing out on.  I needa turn my charm onto high gear if I want to stay on top of things. 

Paul's Life and Letter Final

I missed the final class.  I hadn't had time to study.  I wasn't ready.  But there simply was no more time.  I did it anyways... and boy was it hard.

I hate that feeling.  That feeling of knowing that you don't know it.  It's completely foreign.  Did I even learn this???

I hate that feeling.  Where you see a question and you know you've seen it.  But you choose to overlook it while studying, guessing it won't be asked.

I hate that feeling.  When people around you who showed up after, gets up and leaves.

I hate that feeling.  Where you put down the right answer.... change it...  come out from the test and learn that the first answer was actually right.

I hate that feeling.  I hate that feeling of shame... where I did not live up to my full potential.

I'm thinking to myself: 但求合格、不求高分.  But I still like crap, knowing I could've done better.

LEAD Summit 2019

LEAD Summit officially came to a close today.  Some of my major takeaways....

• Be present
• If you haven't failed... you haven't risked
• WHO AM I? WHAT DO I WANT?
• There are things that are unknown to me... that have hurt others
• What are your "YES" moments?
• And most importantly, "What a tragedy... when you spend all your life trying to climb that ladder of success, only to get to the top and realize the ladder has been leaned against the wrong wall."

Weeks and weeks of preparation.  This is definitely one of those events where I was not emotionally and spiritually vested.  I did it cuz I was asked.  And I certainly did not feel go all-in on this event.  It's hard... I was distracted... so much going on these days.

But personally... being able to Emcee this event... has brought newfound validation to my style.

• Auntie Kin came up to me and said, "Have you thought about a 2nd career in stand up?"
• One of the speakers made a point to come up to me and say, "I've been to many of these events.. but you have redefined the role of emcee-ing.  I have never seen someone connect with the audience like you."
• Cheryl said, "How are you so funny? Is it natural?"
• In our survey response, one person said, "The MC was amazing. Very smooth. Great job!"
• Sandy said, "The speakers were all in awe!  They're not use to San Jose humor!  They never get this in Redding." (what is San Jose humor??"
• Elder Daniel said, "Thank you for the weekend.  You were, like, the 8th speaker!"

I can eat all the humble pie in the world. But it feels so nice to be recognized.  Dunno how I do this... but I'm glad God put me in the position to do what I do.  

I made my daughter cry...

Been one of those weeks.  And today was one of those days.

It was my turn to pick up the kids cuz Joyce has afternoon meetings.  But around 2PM, I had a feeling the meeting was going to run long.. so I told Joyce we might have to send the kids to after care.  I should've, but didn't, send one extra text, "Can you let the school know?" 

When I got to school 30 minutes... the kids were angry and frustrated... for obvious reasons.  It turns out Joyce did not let the school know.. so the kids were just sitting at aftercare waiting.  They walk to the car and one of the parents came up to me and asked if NN was ok, she's crying.

I didn't know what happened... so I gently asked her. 

"You had me so scared and worried!!!" 

Ohhhhhhh.... NN.... Bah B is so sorry. =( 

I couldn't stop her from weeping and balling.  My little baby just lost it.... Shame on me, not for being late, cuz it happens.  Shame on me for not calling.  Sigh....

Back on track... but not quite...

Took the kids running after a week off... and boy did we all feel it.  Also happens that NN is coming down with a cold... and she barely made it past the 1st half mile.  She complained of being tired, out of shape, and her throat hurt when she breathed.

We ended up walking two laps and she was done.  Didn't want to push her too hard.

SW, on the other hand, was Speedy Gonzalez-ing around the track like he's made of feathers.  

We're back on track... oh...but not quite. 

That's just wrong

Went up to the principal today and asked, "Mrs. D, when is the Christmas Performance this year?"
I hardly ever go up to the principal to ask anything.  She must've been shocked when I did.

Her response was, "the 13th."

Me, "Yes!!!  The 19th wouldn't have worked... cuz that's Star Wars opening night.

Principal didn't miss a beat, "Well, that's just wrong."

And that... was the start of a great day (to an otherwise abysmal week).  Couldn't wait to text Gonzo and Anderson.  We're on on for Opening Night!!

I can't help it!!

If you were to ask me... "What's one of my values that will lead to my downfall?" I gotta say... it's my sense of humor and my ability (or curse) of finding humor in all sorts of things.

Case in point... was laughing uncontrollably at {someone's} way of enunciating some words.  Not laughing at that {person}, just found it cute... and then I couldn't stop laughing at the fact I was laughing.

Case in point... was watching Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. with Joyce... and there were so many corny lines and cornier scenes.  Like how a person with a handgun can clean out an army of folks with AR-15.  Probably not a time for jokes about guns in this day and age.  The show was so funny (to me), it got to a point where Joyce said, "Stop it!! Why do you have to ruin it for me!!" 

It was hilarious!! I can't help it!!

仍然在這裡找到一點點光

Had the opportunity to step foot onto SJSU for Mock Interviews.  (題外話,一代不如一代)

Though I'm not an SJSU alum... there's just too many connections to not have a flood of emotions rush at me.  As I was leaving campus... was aimlessly led back to the College of Business.  Made a 90 degree turn and there it is... old faithful.  The monument.  The watch tower.  Our rendevous point for so many years. All those years of college outreach... this Wells Fargo ATM was where we'd always meet.  

About 20 feet away, was a block of cement I sat on with 文靜妹妹 during one of our outreach.  She just came back from Hong Kong and while we were sitting there waiting we suddenly saw a stack of steam come out from one of the boilers where I sarcastically said, "雲柱呀!"

To which she didn't miss a beat and said, "去囉."

這校園、這班房、這走廊、這禮堂... 告别时 是我心的家乡...

Overconfidence

Went running with Nn again this evening.  When we were leaving the house... she boldly said, "Let's go for 6 laps this time!!"  Mom and I said... let's take this one step at a time.  Baby steps.. no need to over-exert ourselves.  And as expected... she got tired after lap 2 and had to walk. 

This time, we got to talking about Private School vs Public School and why we made the decisions we made.  Then she said, "When I go to public school... I'll probably be a lot more advanced then the other kids, huh?"  To which I took the opportunity to ground her a little...  "Don't be the hare that was overconfident.  Slow and steady wins the race."  

Where's everyone?

今晚祈禱會只得五個人,啲人去晒邊呢?  But it turned out to be very sweet and intimate... Praise God!!