Looking back at 2019...

One of my favorite posts of the year... I thoroughly enjoyed this year's Looking Back post.  This year, I wrote a whopping 183 posts.  That's an average of 15.25 posts per month, 3.5 posts per week, or 0.5 posts a day.

2019... was a special year.  To 50% of the population, it marks the end of the decade, the decade that shall be known as the Naughts or the Tens.  It's actually NOT a prime number.  It was the year we embraced the end of the Skywalker Saga. A year where I can't find a list of top 10's for the year, but a bunch of videos.  A year where our USWNT took the nation by storm while Tiger roared back and dawned another Green Jacket. A year where I can't bear to see another child's blood shed.  A year of civil unrest and protests (Foreshadowing my Looking back at the 2010's post).  A year of natural disasters (Foreshadowing my Looking back at the 2010's post). And it was the year that we saw an impeachment. 

That was for the world... but as for me... here is my top 10 for 2019.  Starting selfishly with the Honorable Mentions - surely there will be, with 183 posts!!!

1. 溫婉嫻靜 - my Nui Nui Ju... as penned by her Chinese School teacher.  No compliments have come close to shadowing these four characters that I can't even fully comprehend. 
2. Nui nui woes - my heart aches as I type this knowing that it'll get worse before it gets better. 
3. Awana - 4 months into the program... I can barely recite one bible verse.  Both kids have it rolling off their tongues. 
4. Summer Nomads - week after week, we took the kids to a new camp.  They found new friends. Their normal...as simply chaos.  And in the midst of all that chaos... we had that one day at Lucky's where we had a beautiful scavenger hunt.

And without further ado... in reverse order....

1. Let's Proclaim 2.0 - yet, another 10 weeks of leading kids to question their faith and ultimately give a speech about why they believe in Christ. And I'm still at awe of how I was able to lead that one boy and teach him public speaking... in Mandarin.
2. Reconnecting 2019 - a promise I made to someone where I reconnected with the Fab-5, Nancy and my Coach.  I originally set out to reconnect with my ex'es... but in the end.... some hatchets are probably better left buried. 
3. LEAD Summit - Luminate.  Elevate.  Activate. Duplicate.  "Conversion comes after discipleship."  To be a pioneer of this effort... with zero experience... with even less expectations... in the end... it was my standout SJCAC moment of the year.  
4. Bed Bugs - "Good night.  Sleep tight."  OMG... Just when we thought we cleaned and tossed everything... Just when the exterminators nuked the house... Just when we thought we can buy everything we can buy...   
5. Project 21 - Of the 21 things... I may have accomplished 2-3 of them? And when I apologized to NN for not helping her accomplish her goal (running a 10 minute mile) and me failing on my 21 projects... she gladly offered up, "That's ok Bah-B, we can do it before the end of the SCHOOL year!"  BOOM... just extended Project 21 for 5 more months.
6. Family Fads - we come about 5 years late to these these fads, but boy did it transform our family.  
1. Beyblades - SW was so addicted, focused and dedicated, he designed multiple blades out of Lego, to a point where his blades were able to transform with just a few touches, so he can make instant upgrades.  He'll wake up and start tinkering.  Come home from school and modify it.  He'll spend hours designing, testing and enhancing his blades.  The opportunity finally presented itself culminating in our recent succumbing / spoiling of the starter kit... followed by a half dozen new blades for Christmas.  Rarely does a day go by where you don't hear "Let it RIP!!!!!!!!!!!" 
2. Pokemon Cards - SW got his first set of cards 2 years ago, not cuz he knew what they were, but because everyone else in school had it. 2 years later... we dive head first into the game.  And then the game exploded when we got the Costco expansion decks.  And started reading the graphic novel and watching the show on Netflix.  To this day, we still don't know how to play the game the real way... *shrug*
3. Pokemon Go - What started as a treat during a half-day resulted in days and nights where I Uber my family around looking for raids, gyms and poke-balls.  Mo liu?? Yes... very much so.  And these mo-liu moments will last forever in our family's memories.
7. The Shaw-HANK Redemption and Kintsugi - ever crawl through 5 football fields of sh!t smelling foulness? Ever repair the unrepairable? (Looking up to the heavens...and still wondering...)
8. PCS 2019 - haven't written a post about this yet.  The two biggest things out of this experience... is 1) I need to repair my relationship with mom and 2).....
9. Transformation Continues - A year where she led worship with me at Prayer Meeting... a year where she sacrificed her body (literally) for her daughter at camp... a year where she stepped into the hidden spotlight of translating a sermon... this was yet another year where I find myself in love, more than ever, with my wife.  
10. "Where dreams come true" - By itself... it already stood on the Mt. Rushmore of 2019.  But it came as a pair... how can the mouse ears not rule the year? A year where we not only go on a Disney Cruise, we also visit the "Most Magical Place on Earth."  In all honesty... I'm not a fan of either of these trips.  But when the love of your life has her dreams fulfilled.... and the kids echo saying "best vacation ever", you can only smile... nod... and not look back...

Midnight Mass

As far back as I remember... Christmas Eve service has been in my blood. 

But ever since coming to SJCAC, 12/24 has been on and off. There was one year where SJCAC did not have a Christmas Eve service and I took NN to a service at River of Life.  The next day was the infamous ER day. =(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

This year... Big Bro and I aptly decide to take mom to a Chinese Christmas Eve Mass.  It wasn't a Midnight Mass.  But it was still very special.

The scent of frankincense.  The adoration of baby Jesus. The script of the Liturgy.  Everything was still there.  I loved it. 

I have to say... the entire Liturgy... is biblical.  Everything said...every song sang... every sacrament practiced... I can't rebut.  I loved the homily.  The priest was 99% on point...up until he mentioned the adoration of the Virgin Mary.  That part... I cringed.

I also cringed at some of the practices the people did...to a point where I pissed mom off.  Why were ppl bowing to the altar????? At 9 out of 10 churches...the Tabernacle resides behind the altar. Not at this church.  Mom's comeback was... this is where Jesus had his last supper. Poor to piss poor response mom.  And she knew it... to a point when she left, she genuflected to the actual tabernacle. 

I liked how the powerpoint said, "Due to Flu Season, we won't be shaking hands."  I told mom that... and her response was, "It's still acceptable."  Heh... she didn't get it.

I liked how the priest said to kneel during the Nicene Creed... mom didn't kneel... and I asked if she wanted to.  She said, "It's not required." She doesn't know.

I was raised a Catholic.  I'm still a Catholic.  There may be fundamental beliefs that are different.  But what will always ring true.... Jesus is the Messiah.  He came and saved all of us. Will you accept His act of Salvation and believe in Him?? If you do... then you too... are saved. 

42 years in the making

And 42 years later... the Skywalker Saga ends.

My initial reactions: 3.5 out of 5 Stars.

It wasn't good. It really wasn't.  JJ Abrams is suppose to be all that and a bag of chips.  Bullsh*t.  So many things that could've been done better.  Simple things.

Ppl flocked to End Games over and over again to complete the Avengers saga, or Harry Potter, or even Frozen.  But Star Wars???  They're overdependent on the original trilogy to sell tickets for this one.  And if I step off the pyramid of pride for a second... and worry only on the story alone... this movie isn't good enough to sell tickets on story alone.

My heart sinks on how my beloved Star Wars end this way.  Plot holes? Closed.  But as my buddy at work asked, "Is your cup full or empty?"  My answer... "My cup is full.  That cup is a beer mug... but it's full of Bud Light."

Let's Proclaim

NN has a class presentation tomorrow.

Last night... she showed me her charts.  I couldn't help it... I had to change her slides.
Tonight... she went over her presentation with me.  I couldn't help it... I had to change her script.  I had to persuade her to add pauses... slow down... and add hand-motions.

She'll knock it out of the park. I know she will.

There are two things I look for her on her report card.  Bible and Behavior.  Let's add a third thing (if it even exists)... public speaking.  Heh...

12:16

Even when the dark comes crashing through... when you need a friend to carry you...

【百感交集】

Pastor Ted knew it... he knew I was gonna get choked up.  On stage.  In front of everyone.  But he did it anyways.  I've heard his testimony a thousand times.  And on the thousand and first time... it still tore me apart.  I was a mess that entire morning.  Then when my emotions finally settled down...

The Niners blew it.  I got so pissed.  To a point where even when my kids came to console me and hug me... I sent them away.  To a point where... I had to take a walk outside... only to punch a wooden column and bruise my knuckles.  So stupid of me.

And yet.. .that's who I am.  I hate it sometimes, how I literally where my emotions on my sleeves.  I wish I can be more stoic sometimes.  Wish I didn't have that big of a heart.

Oh.... to feel.

The Art of Ordering Food

A few things I take interest and dare I say pride in... is ordering food for the table.  It takes practice... it takes knowing your audience.  It's knowing what's good... knowing what's filling... and knowing the general way chef's cook. 

At a big church party... I had the pleasure and honor (and even a little guilty pleasure) in ordering food for 3 tables of adults and 1 table of kids.  I think I could've done better... shouldn't have taken the easy way out and ordered 4x the food.

At a family dinner... I once again... had the chance to order.  I love having control... love reading the menu... love conversing with the waiter... love debating with them when they recommend something that's expensive but impractical.  I love ordering weird stuff that normal families wouldn't order... but knowing the kids would love it.  I love it when other tables look at our food longingly and curiously.  I love it when the neighboring table comes and steals our food.  I love it when kids who usually don't eat can't stop eating.  I love it when adults would fight the kids for those off-menu items. Then of course... I love it when the parents compliment me on picking the exact right things at the right time at the right restaurant in the right weather.

Ordering food and pairing it.  It's not just a culinary science.  It's an art.  If I had a chance at a second career... it would be in the medical field.  If I had a chance at a third career... I'd be a chef and open my own restaurant. 

To dream.

Death of a Thousand Dinosuars

"You can hear it... you know it's being made." 

Comment from one barista to another when I ordered the Egg Nog Latte. Heh..

I guess that's another reason why some Peet's no longer carry it.  They don't like make it. 
It's loud.  It's obnoxious.  And one barista even said... "It's the sound of death of a thousand dinosaurs." Regardless of the sound... it tastes ohhhhhhh soooooo good.

Maximizing my Time

On a cross-country, 4 hour flight... I couldn't find any good movies to watch.  Didn't feel like investing 2 hours of my time on any one movie.  So I ended up re-watching a romantic comedy for its mindless enjoyment factor. Then I found a new-found pleasure.  I picked 4 movies... and skipped to the last 10 minutes to watch the endings.

Was able to knock out a bunch of movies I otherwise would never be caught dead watching - even if it's free.  And 4 out of 4... so glad I didn't waste my time building up to an otherwise dismal movie.  

C3PO

久違了的感覺. 不知有多年日能聽到一首令我流淚的歌典、令我全神貫注的一個MV，令我立刻拾起結他邊彈邊唱的歌曲。這首歌是我喜愛的李克勤所唱, 歌詞是克勤用來描述我至小有無限passion的星球大戰。雖然有無比快慰， 但也非常寂寞。遺憾的是，沒有知音人能陪我一起去欣賞。我朋友已經不多. 中文朋友甚少能夠體會到當中歌詞的隱意。喜愛星戰的朋友,沒有一個懂得中文或能欣賞克勤的歌韻。

有很多細節上的事是難以捉摸難以解釋、就如：

• 莉亞永遠是公主殿下, 潔白裙上是絕代芳華 - 完整地交代了Princess Leia的性質
• 但我是鋼鐵外殼妳介意嗎, 我沒時尚造型但落力護花 - 無缺地形容了Artoo 和Threepio一生的使命
• 冰山就是描述Hoth。
• 激光劍充心表明了Han Solo轟烈的犧牲。
• 飾演MV中的何先生的好朋友大隻蕾蕾充滿頭髮帶有鬍鬚便是Chewie.
• 第2段之前能聽到Artoo的叫聲。
• 不能不提就是MV的女主角。在香港娛樂圈也很難找到一位能配得上莉亞的玉女形象，唯有他。他就是周慧敏

當MV到了終站、克勤說了一句"I love you." 對普通人來說, 這是一首情歌完美的結局。 但能夠將完美帶到更高境界, 就是周慧敏回應的一句、”I know.” 普通星戰粉絲來說，戲中最出名的兩句說話就是”May the Force be with you” 和 “I am your father.” 但是一個星戰戀慕成痴的、最感人莫過於 Han Solo 變成 carbonite 前和Leia說的 “I love you.” “I know.” 這句對白。

調查中,得知周慧敏拍MV時是不能當場說出"I know"這兩個字。事關他和克勤的友誼竟然產生到一份莫名的awkwardness. 最後慧敏是回到家中錄了這兩個字,然後寄給導演讓他加插落去。 這個小動作反而產生到一個更超然的效果，就是MV的女主角是從世界的另一邊說出這句說話。

滿意為老婆聽到最後對白時，會黯然落淚，誰知... 沒緊...

12/19日，我等得你好苦呀!!  

A Mother's Sacrifice

Hanging out with SIL... she narrates her adventures of hunting down a Christmas tree with the kids in the rain, hauling it back into the house by herself and oh btw... the kids also wanted to pick up a reindeer made out of firewood.  Why? Cuz it looks nice.  She rolls her eyes a bit... and it brings back a montage of memories...

One of my first (and only memory) of kindergarten was the Christmas Performance.  We dressed as soldiers - apparently toy soldiers - to fit into the story.  To this day I have no idea what the Performance was about.  Except, when I showed up in the dressing room, all my friends had a GI-JOE helmet on and they all had guns.  Well... we didn't know we can bring guns to a church.  When mom saw that everyone had it... she dropped me off, ran back home from SSPP to get it.  That wasn't a short walk, even if mom was in her mid to late 30's.  But she came back in time... so her son won't be the odd boy out.  

Flash forward a couple of years and I can still see mom and her two boys in the streets of Chinatown, trying to haul a fake Christmas tree up 10 city blocks in hilly San Francisco.  She somehow busted out with a little pocket knife to carve little triangular holes so we can grab onto the box.  I have no reference to the weight of the thing, but it mustn't be light.  Nor were the 3 of us mightily strong.  But at the end... we hauled the darn thing up 1090, just like SIL hauled it into her house.

After telling these stories, I said to SIL, "Many years from now... your kids will remember all that you've done to make their Christmas, just a little more Christmassy."

And with that... a bah-hum bug to you shopping season!!