That moment all parents dread...

You always want people to walk up to you and compliment on how well your child is behaving.

But you dread the moment that someone walks up to complain about your little angel.

This happened on Saturday... when we were at Barnes and Noble, our favorite "library" where we hang out and rarely buy anything.  The kids love it cuz the books are more complete than a regular public library... and the place is just nice to hea.

On this day... SW comes running with a little jack-in-the-box toy... something we use to play with when he was much younger.  I guess the toy evoked happy memories for him.  While he was showing us his new found treasure, a parent walks up to us and said, "He snatched that from my daughter."

My heart sank.  My boy??? My angel did what?!?!?

The mom was very polite and courteous.  She wasn't out to get revenge or anything.  Her daughter on the other hand, was in shock and obviously very sad.  I quickly made SW apologize... which he did.  And the mom said, "It's ok."  She looked at her daughter... and said, "You're ok.  Let's go."

My son... my angel... my little treasure.  I'm still reeling from shock.

Adieu

After 9 great years... finally bid farewell to our wonderful Honda Civic.  It was about 200 miles short of hitting 150,000.   We took great care of the car and was confident in its performance.  I really wanted to pass it onto dad since we were due to upgrade to a bigger car anyways.  But alas...  nothing happens exactly as planned.  It was a big poignant when I said my last goodbyes.

8 year anniversary

On the 8 year anniversary of my nn....gotta repost the running blog of "Birth of my Child."

http://gothenry.blogspot.com/2009/07/birth-of-my-child-running-diary.html?m=1

There's no way I could've summarized the birth of my child in a paragraph or two. Since I had a laptop with me (and a lot of spare time), here's my first ever Running Diary of the events that transcribed leading up to the birth of my child...

June 16, 2009

8:15PM - Joyce started having contractions about 24 hours ago. We're considering heading over to the Lee's for the Joseph College / YA Meeting. We even drove up to their front door. But their driveway and adjacent spaces were full. Joyce wasn't up for walking. so we went to Tops Cafe for dinner instead.

10:35PM - We call the on-call doctor. She suggests we go to the hospital. Frankly, we thought it was still too early.

11:00PM - Arrived at Labor and Delivery and checked in. We're very confident they'll send us home since contractions are still pretty far apart (7-10 min). Doesn't everyone get sent home at least once? It's amazingly quiet here. I thought June will be high-season. 

11:30PM - Just got confirmation we're staying the night! Turns out Joyce is dilated at 3-4 cm already!! I still have no clue what that means - but it sounds like she's making progress.

June 17, 2009

12:30AM - Officially admitted to Good Samaritan. I've always wondered is Good Sam a Christian Hospital? Or are they publically declaring - "We are not Christians or Jews, we are Samaritans who don't follow your religion but we'll take care of you anyways!"

2:30AM - Our RN, Nurse #1, says we have about 3 hours of waiting until the next milestone. She pulls out my comfy bed (something short of a Futon) for me and wants us to get some rest. 

2:35AM - I hear what I think are sirens - this is a hospital afterall. But the siren sound doesn't go away! Goodness - it's a woman screaming!! Her voice is coming through the air vents. There's a woman - giving birth without an epidural!! Her screams are loud, crisp and painful!! Every 2 minutes!! And they last a full minute!! "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" We ask for ear plugs. It doesn't help. Why don't they sound proof these walls?!?!?!

3:00AM - Can't stand it anymore. I rather go home for a shower since Joyce isn't near ready yet and that lady isn't near done screaming. 

5:30AM - Nurse #1 says Joyce is around 6-7cm. Joyce hasn't slept a wink in over 24 hours due to the contractions. She asks for some medication but those only numb her for an hour. I wonder if I can take some medication too so I can get some shut-eye. Doubt it.

7:00AM - Changing of the shifts - new nurse - Nurse #2 comes in. Changing nurses is like getting a new teacher when you're in elementary school. Going from one grade to another, you've spent all year with your favorite teacher! No other teacher in the world can be as great as your previous teacher. Only you find out that your previous teacher... really wasn't that great.

7:26AM - Joyce had enough. She needs some sleep and rest so the anesthesiologist comes into adminster the epidural. He looks eerily like my old lead back at work. Nah... couldn't be. Anyhoo, I seriously thought Joyce could've done this without an epidural. She's such a trooper! 

7:53AM - Nurse #2 checking on Joyce again - dilated to 6+. I've once had my eyes dilated. Is this the same thing?

7:55AM - Water broke - finally. That's good - cuz we didn't want it to mess up our bed or inside our car. 

8:15AM - Our OB Dr. Z stops by to say "Hi" on her way to work. How nice! Says we'll have this baby by lunchtime!! 

8:30AM - I make a quick run to Starbucks and go home to send a prayer request email and get our phone chargers. If the baby's coming at noon, we better have our phones ready to text like mad!!

9:00AM - Come back to see Joyce sleeping. Phew... didn't miss any excitement. Always the fear of "going to do something" and missing the birth of your child. Not this time... not yet.

9:30AM - Selai Chan calls to wish us well. 

11:30AM - I'm hungry. Run downstairs to the cafeteria and quickly decide to skip out to Carl's Jr. instead. Come back with a Wester Bacon Cheeseburger and Crisscut Fries. Didn't need to get a soda cuz Good Sam has a pantry full of goodies. (Yay Good Sam!)

12:30PM - Since this morning, Pitocin dosage went from 2 milliUnits / min to 5 to 7 to 9 to 8 to 7. We're trying to increase the frequency of the contractions. We've now hit the 36 hour mark. The contractions are too sporadic. When will this end?

12:45PM - Just got done reading the story from Geoff. Great short story about a father and his newborn daughter. I'm getting sleepy from waiting. Gonna take a 5 minute power nap.

1:10PM - Nurse #2 comes in and checks on Joyce again. She's at 9.5. In another half hour, we'll start pushing. WOW... this is really happening! 

2:45PM - Officially started pushing. We didn't attend any of the Labor / Breathing Class so we get a 15 second crash course on how to do this. "Three quick breaths, deep inhale and PUSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (count to 10), exhale, deep inhale, PUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSSSSH (count to 10), exhale, deep inhale, PUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSSSH (count to 10), exhale. Repeat."

3:00PM - Shift change again. Nurse #2 leaves and here comes Nurse #3. Too bad, cuz I really liked Nurse #2. And she wanted to see us through this delivery. (Still pushing, btw)

3:35PM - HOLY TOLEDO I see the top of head!! GEEZ!!!! Y'know... this isn't as bad as most people make it. I'm not going to faint! This is easy peesy - japanesey!

3:50PM - Nurse #3 says she's going to call Dr. Z. Huh?!? Does that mean.... we're almost there?????? I'm breaking out a huge sweat just coaching Joyce to breathe. Can't even imagine what she's going through. 

4:05PM - Dr. Z finally shows up. Sure sign that this wasn't going to be a C-section finally secured itself. Dang...the doc is so calm and cool. Another day in the office for her. Life changing experience for us.

4:30PM - Dr. Z: "Okay, your husband's been a great coach so far. This time, I want you to listen to me. When I say push, you're going to push longer than before. We're going to get her out this time. " And with that... out came the rest of the head.... one more push and out came out the rest of the body. She's.... gray! And then within seconds, she turns pink! Looks just like me. It's amazing! Everything from here on out was a blur... thank goodness for cameras.

4:35PM - It's decided. "Rachel" Final Four Choices: Rachel, Victoria, Abigail, Kaitlyn. Yeah... "Rachel" it is.

6:00PM - Our first visitor, Rachel's 大伯父. Comes marching in with a pair of pink mylar balloons. How sweet. Would've preferred a box of 燒鴨飯 to be honest.

7:15PM - The Louie's show up with the traditional ginger fried rice. HA! Rachel's spiritual grandparents and spiritual uncle!! 

8:15PM - Get transferred from Labor & Delivery to Mom & Children. Right before we take off, Rachel decides she's hungry and mom has to feed her while being wheeled off. Talk about timing.

9:15PM - Rachel gets her first bath / diaper change. WOW... what kind of poop is that?!? It's black and tar-like!! Sorta like what I make after a night out at a Giants game with hot dogs, beer and garlic fries. Hmmmm.....

10:05PM - Finally some rest on the same POS chair. All in a day's work. Now the fun really begins... 

End of Running Diary

Headaches still lurking

Been officially 7 days since the accident... the concussion.  And the headaches are still here.  It's traveling.  Yesterday, it was right behind my ear!!  All day... I was grimacing and tearing up cuz of the sharp pain.  I was wondering... did a spider crawl into my ear canal and start laying eggs?  Will this ever go away??????

I didn't dare watch...

Game 5... Warriors found redemption.  And as the final 3 seconds ticked away (Durant was actually traveling), it was a roar of celebration... it was a sigh of relief.

The entire night... I didn't dare watch.  I hid in the room and followed on my ESPN app and Twitter.  Don't think I could've been able to watch real time.  Towards the beginning of the 3rd quarter.. I turned on the radio for a few minutes... and the Cavs started to make a run.  So I turned it off.  Superstitious??? Naaaaaaa..... but why take the chance?

The next day.... I ran to Dick's Sporting Goods to pick up some championship gear.  Not for me... but for dad.  In 2015... I went late and all the limited edition, good stuff were gone.  I felt so bad.  This time... I made sure I had my selection.  When I called dad...and asked him what color he wanted... I was amazed that he said, "Can you get me #35?" 

Astounded!!  Dad never asks for anything.  He always pushes gift aside.  But this time, he made a special request for Durant.  When half the Bay Area was breathing a sigh of relief... Dad was one of those roaring in celebration. 

A moment in time....

Law of average says it's bound to happen to you.... no matter how safe you drive.

My last major accident was in 2000. 17 years later came the next one... and thankfully the kids weren't in the back seat. Thankfully. 

It all happened so fast. I stopped . But the guy behind me didnt stop in time... he didn't leave enough space. I vaguely remember stopping, trying to glance at my rear view mirror, and before I knew it... "BOOM!"  Everything inside the car went flying.... coffee mug, garage door opener, coins....

I got hit so hard... I ended up hitting the car in front of me!  The lady came out and first thing I noticed was... her tummy. Oh no.... pray that she's not pregnant!! I almost asked her... and luckily, she said her husband is home with the baby. Phew.... no baby in th me car, no baby in the tummy and no embarrassing moment for me. All three of us made it out ok... though we were all shaken up. 

I got to work to call insurance and I was already feeling the aches, pains.... and worst yet... I was seeing spots out of my eyes. The headache worsensed.... and I was feeling nauseous. So this is what a concussion feels like. Man oh man....

That night... after all was taken care of, I felt the urge to text and pray for everyone. They both responded cordially.  But man... you can be the most defensive driver out there, but when the time comes, it comes. 

SPOILED!!!

Sometimes... I find myself really not liking kids.


Stayed afterschool today to play with them since it was the last day of school... was playing soccer with some of the boys.  This one boy in particular just won't listen and kept using his hands.


When I started talking to him... he'll just turn around... and walk away, completely ignoring you.


If that was my kid... or my student... I'd unleash the Wrath of Hank on him on the spot! So disrespectful... no manners.  The worst thing is... his mom was right there!! Didn't do a thing.


Parenting... I can't judge and make accusations.  But I can blog about it privately.... UGH!!!

沒料到我所失的 竟已是我的所有

As I was packing up my stuff... readying to move to a new position in a different building.. I started to feel this rush of sadness. 6 years, I gave my blood and sweat for this program. And now... all I had was 8 empty boxes and an office full of memories.  No fanfare. No goodbye party.  No frame or shadowbox. 

I actually declined several attempts to throw me a party.  I'm not that type.  But to think... two of my previous peers not only had a party... they had the VP show up... they got a nice shadow box.  Did I really wear away my welcome that much where I didn't even deserve a handshake from the VP?

After packing up the last box... and only having one person stop by, look at me me, shake his head (it was his way of saying "Good luck!")... I closed the door to my office with my Giants umbrella, and left the office I called home for the past 6 years.

Suddenly had this huge empathetic moment of where 關羽 was exiled from 曹操's camp... after all the battles and wars he won.  The only thing he had while riding his 赤兔馬 and gripping his 青龍偃月刀 was his honor.  He still held his head high.

And with that... I hold my head high as I start a new chapter in my career as a Senior Manager.  Never thought I'd climb this far up in a big company like mine.  But as he continues to lead... I will continue to follow.  

It's still nice to hear....

I'm not big on compliments.  More often than not... when people say nice things about me, I think it's out of courtesy.  Or I feel that it's part of my duty to act a certain way. 


This weekend... my MIL sent me a text after the Mother's Day dinner that made me puff up my chest just a little bit.  "Thanks for holding the mother's day party.  I'm so happy and impressed that you are a great father and husband.  Thanks for everything." 


I really could care less about what they think of how I treat their daughter or their grandkids... cuz again, I stand on solid ground on who I am.  But still... it's still nice to hear.


However... despite what MIL said, it simply doesn't rank up there with what my FIL said to me the day I asked him for his blessing before proposing to Joyce.  "我都好放心將曉瑜交比你."
So simple... so direct... yet so authoritative.   

塞翁失馬焉知非福

After a phone screen... after 3 on-sites.... I finally got this email today:

Hi Henry,

Thanks so much for your interest in XXXXXX and this position alike. I did receive feedback from the team. Overall, the team is looking for additional relevancy for this specific role. 

I will continue to keep you in mind for future roles as well. Thanks again for your interest in XXXXXX and this role alike.

I was so bummed when I got the email.  I had such high hopes.  Not that I was going to take the job, necessarily.  But after going through so many rounds, and feeling like I killed it every round, this came as a shocker.  It's humbling... it's shell-shocking... it's a reality check.

Makes me think... if I can't even get this opportunity, when will there be a better opportunity?? Do I believe in His providence???  Or does He really want me to stay put at where I am?? 

Something smells funny...

Rarely do we use the oven, but when we decided to turn it on last night, we smelled something funny.  So stupidly... I stick my nose up by the oven door and open it up to take a closer look.  Praise God for His protection.  Within 2 seconds of opening the door, I see a fireball puff out from the oven.  I quickly close my eyes and snap back!! 

But I can feel my hair on fire.  And my eye lashes are cinched. 

Had it been 1 second.  Or had it been a bigger fire-puff.... I'd be in the hospital with 2nd degree burns! 

WTH.... this is a newly remodeled home!! ARGH!!!!