Backfiring

COVID-19 - School Closure - Day 157  School Reopens - Day 19

NN got through her audition... and there's no way to sugar coat it... she utterly, royally screwed up.  

She was nervous.  She couldn't stop fidgeting and singing prior to the audition time.  She did not listen to my advice... nor did I want to add anymore pressure.  

I told her to get ready to answer some questions.  State your name.  Act calm and confident.  She opted for the big smile... cutsie... nervous imbalance self.  Trying to be cute? Trying to gain sympathy points? 

She played the instrumental track.... and actually missed her part to enter.

She got a 2nd chance... and right away... you can hear she was tight, started on the wrong key, and not singing well.  She couldn't even hit the high note we've been practicing.

She got a 3rd chance... and she hit the first high not... but was too strained to finish the song.  Her voice cracked.

"Thank you.  You'll be hearing from us." 

I was so disappointed.  I AM so disappointed. I know she can do better.  Kicking myself for not having her practice more leading up to the audition.  Kicking myself for not being a better vocal coach (like I know anything).  This was the worst case scenario.  Had some done her best... left it all on the table... and not gotten a part... that's fine.  But now... now begins the nightmare.  And I had nightmares all night.  Cuz of this!?!?!?

This was just like that interview from a few years ago... where I couldn't sleep the next few days while waiting for the results.  This was horrible.  

Joyce thinks this is a learning moment.  She should've listened to us.  Should've heeded our advice and picked the song we thought she can sing.  Should've thrown that "false humble" crap out the window.  Should've been true to herself and go after what she wants.  Instead... she picked a song she couldn't sing, shouldn't have sang.  She didn't even get out of the chute.  And now she's wallowing in her misery.  Texting her friends saying, "I don't even want a part.  My parents forced me."  And then following up with, "Did you get a call back email? I'm not even going to check. I know I didn't get it." 

Now... she's in the sour-grapes phase while we wait.   Ugh... Yes, you want your child to experience failure so they can get back up.  But at the same time..... Ugh....