Agony

COVID19 - School Closure - Day 157  School Reopens - Day 138

At deepest moment of the night... my abdomen hollered from a piercing, twisting pain.  The pain was so bad... so deep... so debilitating, I barely got out of bed and crawled to the bathroom.  My knees were weak.  I was half awake. My senses were whacked. I was disoriented and operating solely on instinct to find the toilet.  When I finally sat down on the icy cold bowl... I was jackknifed in torment that I started to hyperventilate... short on breath.  I needed to sit back up to get air into my lungs...but the pain snapped by body shut.  I stole an inch here or there from the jaws of life to steal a quick gasp of oxygen and slammed back down in agony.  Nothing was coming out... it wasn't that type of pain.  But instinctively... I had to be on the toilet.  Was it appendicitis??? Is this what labor feels like?? Or what women go through every month? Why is this happening????  As the slamming throb became a prickly sting... I slowly came to some consciousness.  I was able to squeeze something out to pass whatever needs passing... and in the dark, in my wooziness... I searched and discovered a whole new function of the bidet. "Ohhhhhh!!!.... so that's what that buttons for!!!"