Social Etiquette

The past few months... I've been helping one of our church sister's with applying for low-income housing.  Not to overshare here... but this sister is definitely in need of a professional worker - not someone like me.  But... in this geo-political-economy... those walking saints are as rare as a Buffalo Nickel.  

I've learned so much during these days.  In time of a need... I turn to my parents for help (heh...).  And cuz they have more experience in this arena.  Dad coins it as... "僧多粥少."  Out of desperation.. I started randomly calling and applying to any place that advertised "senior housing" or "low-income housing."  Along the way... I met some angels of my own... giving me advice and hints of what to do.  As I'm filling out these forms... and making these phone calls... I can't help but pry into someone's private life.  Their birthday.  Their social security number. Their income.  Their bank accounts.  There's a certain level of vulnerability that is revealed... and a certain level of trust that is established.

But this level of trust is fuzzy... is confusing.  To a point where... I get 4-5 calls a day.  Some of these calls are simply asking, "Did you receive my text?"  On the worst day of the year... when I was tired... frustrated... sleep deprived... and I got a late night call... I had to sternly but gracefully lay down the law.  "Let's talk about it tomorrow."  Only to receive a call at 6:30AM.... and I was trying to sleep in.  "XXXX... can you not call me so early??"  

On the other end of the line... I hear sobbing.  Crying.  Defeated, then I ask, "How can I help you?"  To get a response of... "Nevermind." (Hung up)

What to do... what to do....??

不眠不休

Attended Siu Wah's Robotics Club Warehouse Competition yesterday.  After two weeks of Beginner's Robotics Camp... it was the final competition.  

I'm so proud of him.  He's shown so much grit and tenacity. He looks forward to going to camp.  He comes home and tells us about his code or his manipulator and chassis.  He was sad when he missed camp cuz of a doctor's appointment. He skipped the Warriors parade (thankfully) cuz he didn't want to miss any coding time.

Then on the last day... he wanted to get to camp early.  He said... none of his friends ate lunch.  They worked. None of them took their snack break.  They worked. 

On second thought... should I be proud??? Or scared that Silicon Valley is already getting its grip around their innocent little necks???? 

Roe v Wade

Never in my lifetime did I expect Roe v Wade to be overturned.  Never say never.

It was 5th grade when I was first introduced to abortion.  Sr. Celine told us about it.  Then showed us pictures of dead babies... body parts.  It made a lasting impression on how Catholics view abortion and I was a stalwart Pro-Lifer.

Then in high school... in the midst of liberal, public San Francisco education... I learned that my family members had abortions.  I clearly remember having that discussion with dad... where I said, "The baby is innocent."  And his response was, "Some times... you don't have a choice." 

Then in college... I was surrounded by more progressive thinkers and it was all about human rights and the right to choose. In English 114... one of our "essays" was to write to our congress-person stating our stance.  Our professor was clear in his direction... "You are Pro-Life or Pro-Choice.  I don't think there's anyone that's Pro-Abortion."  

And that's been my stance... my struggle.  This is about a woman's choice.  Her body.  As odd or as unfair as it sounds... it truly is a woman's body.  Do we take away the ability for her to make a choice?? Does the government have that right??  Does the government have the right to enforce... safety belts? It's my body.  Or to wear mask... it's my body.  Does the government allow one to self-mutilate? Or to put it more kindly... what if I wanted a tattoo? Or wanted to amputate my own arm? It's my body.  The arguments are endless. 

Well... to be clear... today...the Supreme Court did not take away any rights.  It merely says the Federal Government will leave it to the State Government to enforce. The SCOTUS has done that on numerous occasions - right, wrong, or indifferent. 

As a Christian... isn't that one of the most revered, sacred gifts we have... the grace to "choose."  We aren't robots.  We don't have to believe.  We don't have to follow.  We're given the choice.  And if God gave us the ability to choose....... 

(to be continued....)

Unintentional IT Support Comedy

All those years of IT support with mom has prepared me for this.  I was doing IT support over the phone with a tech-newbie..  I spent almost 10 minutes telling someone to hit the Home button on her iPad. I was having an impossible time describing how to hit that button - blind.  Then I tried to facetime or video call her... and she didn't know how to flip the phone's camera. She was at a point of yelling at me when she could NOT find the "circle" or the button.  Adamant that one doesn't exist.  It got to a point where I was making zero progress... I gave up.  We'll do it Sunday.  Bring your iPad to church.  Oh my... 

Warriors Championship Parade

This can only happen once in a lifetime... but amazingly... it's happened 4x for the Warriors and 3x for the Giants. (When will the Niners get theirs?!?!?!)

Surprisingly... NN agreed to go out to the city with me and hang out with dad for the parade.  

I wanted it to be a perfect day... but that's exactly what it wasn't.  First off... do you take public transit (during COVID??) or drive and pay? I reserved a spot for $20.

Then it's finding a spot to hang out. We started out 2 layers deep (schucks) and ended up 5 layers deep by the time the parade started. 

Dunno what the City did or what the Warriors decided to do... but we got there at 9AM.... and stood until 12:40PM until a real float showed up. GEEZ LOUISE PUH-LEEZ!!!!  I felt so bad.... we shoulda stood at the front of the parade... so it's get in get out.  We ended up baking in the sun.  We were crowded. We sniffed marijuana and 2nd hand smoke for hours. And we endured hours of yelling and cussing.

More importantly... as we walked from our Hall of Justice parking to the parade... NN got to experience the "city."  Homelessness. Drunks. Mentally unstable. Loud traffic. They were all there.... to a point where I felt it was irresponsible to bring a teenage girl to the city.  But I aptly said... "I walked these streets all the time as a kid." And that wasn't a lie.

We missed lunch...and ended finding a hole in the wall, Chinese BBQ place in Portola Valley and we were famished.  Inhaled our food and then found a way to convince dad to let me drive him home.  That ended up being an hour detour.  It was so hard to drive in and out of the city.  And Google maps routed me through all these streets and neighborhoods I've never been.  The city is alive. 

After I got home… I regretted so many things. I regretted not bringing lawn chairs with us to sit. I regretted making NN endure what she endured. I regretted making dad stick with us for the 5 hours. And as I’m putting Nn to bed… she said “Forget the bad. Remember the good. This was a good day.”

Fathers Day 2022

A very happy Father's Day.  

The gifts was nothing of a surprise.  I picked out my Ultimate Warrior and Macho Man socks a few weeks ago.  And Joyce gave in... and got me some drum sticks. 

Got to church early and was able to help Siu Han with her iPad. 

NN, SW and the Yu's kid attended worship... as I walked in.. they "danced" to 神大愛。

I was once gifted the honor to translate the sermon... on Father's Day no less. And afterwards... Joyce even complimented me... which is as rarer than a blue moon. 

As I'm leaving church... I see an elderly gentleman at a bus stop.  He rarely comes to church cuz of his ailing health and public transit isn't comfortable.  Today... I was able to give him a ride home.

After church, we went to a filling, yummy lunch at Ming's Tasty.  Something I've been craving... but have avoided cuz of the cost.  It's hard to do business these days.

Came home after lunch and the MSG helped me nap a little. 

Around 3PM... we drove out to Thrive City. Thought about buying a Locker Room championship T-shirt... $45!!!!  Ended up taking pictures of us holding the shirt instead.  

Then headed over to dinner with dad... I was F1 racing through the streets of SF... cuz I told dad we'll be there at 5:30 and google maps said I'll be there at 5:32PM.  Grrrr... hate being late!!!

Sigh... but when we got to the pizzeria... dad said he already ate pizza for lunch, so he was gonna order spaghetti.  I didn't know.  So I offered to get Chinese instead.  Dad said... "好." But out of nowhere... SW screams, "唔好!!"  That was so unexpected.  So disrespectful.  I immediately roared at him, "What day is today?!?!?"  And he immediately started tearing up.  His teeth was chattering out of fear.  He knows he f-ed up.  

Dad quickly jumped in... told me to stop staring.  That everything is OK.  In my mind... I knew what the right thing to do was. But still... I couldn't stop myself from giving SW the Stare of Death.  Poor guy... he used all his strength to hold his tears in.  

We ended up staying.  We had a great time.  Great conversation.  And in the middle of dinner... dad lectured me in front of everyone.  "The kids... they have their own personalities. They're own thinking.  Don't hinder it with your anger.  Or they will never express it in front of you."  And I did... what I would want my son and daughter to do... I simply nodded. And accepted my father's rebuke. 

After dinner.... dad wanted to walk home.  We didn't try to stop him.  He's too free spirited.  And after a big dinner... he needed a smoke.  As for us... we drove back down home while listening to an audio book... and the entire family fell asleep. 

A wonderful... .WONDERFUL... Father's Day for me.

Music Lessons

One of the biggest regrets of my life... is never having learned music.  As a very young kid... I had violin lessons.  But I hated it.  Of course I did... I was a kid.  Personally... I don't think my parents did enough.  And I wasn't paired with the right teacher. 

Many many years later... I picked up the guitar and learned a few chords and strum patterns.  Enough to get by... and jam to myself.

And then today... I officially joined my first instrument class - Drums.  Ha!! And it was taught by teenagers. Youths... from our church.  I loved it.  Every minute of it.  And I hate to say it... but I think I was top of the class.  I was able to follow the patterns.  Able to keep up with the metronome. I was able to identify blindly the different parts of a drum set.  I think.... I'm going to start my own garage band!!!!  LET'S DO IT!!!! 

This moment in time...

Game 6 of the NBA finals... and we did it.  We closed it out. (Yes, we). One of my direct reports said he's not going to eat pizza... cuz every time he does, we lose.  We were up by 12 in the final minute... and I was still nervous.  Boston put in their bench guys to give them a "Finals experience" and I was still nervous. And now... I'm planning on the parade with dad... WITH DAD!!!!

I think: this is one of the happiest moments of my life cuz the kids were also present and cognizant
I know: this lightning in a bottle may never happen again
I want: a Super Bowl more than a NBA Championship
I have: this thing stuck in my teeth, but I can't get it out
I wish: the Warriors could've closed it out at home
I hate: that the Giants and Warriors have won... but not the Niner
I miss: the days of MCC
I fear: that this will be the last one for a looooooooong time
I hear: Bill Simmons on the BS Podcast
I wonder: if we can keep this dynasty going
I regret: not going to a game with Dad this year
I love: the fact that NN understands what's going on in a game
I ache: on my shoulders cuz of the sunburn from last Friday
I care: that sports is so meaningful to my family
I always: use sports analogies at work
I am not: a good loser
I dance: because my daughter is an amazing dancer
I sing: Perfect by Ed Sheeran
I cry: when I watch Chicago Med
I do not always: treat {{someone}} the way they oughta be treated
I fight: to keep my managers interested and connected
I write: because I was once complimented to be one that "paints with words"
I win: when the Warriors win!!!!
I lose: when the Niners lose
I confuse: red from green cuz I'm color blind
I listen: to the voice of the Holy Spirit
I can usually be found: smiling
I need: a promotion
I am happy about: playing basketball with my kids after work
I should: get my PhD while my parents are still around

Hank from San Jose

Called into KNBR sports talk radio and announced myself as "Hank from San Ho" and I killed it!!! I rehearsed what I was gonna say.  My heart was beating at 200 mph while I was on hold.  And when I was live... I delivered one of the best calls ever... to a point where the host, FP Santangelo, said that's the strongest call since he started hosting and he invited me back. 

I love sports.  I really do. 

Getting back to normal...

 Been two days since I've tested negative.  

Immediately... on Friday.. I took the kids to the beach.  We had a wonderful lunch at Rock Bottom brewery.. followed by 1.5 hr of traffic before ending up at Rio Del Mar beach in Capitola. SW and NN had a wonderful time.  Ironically... of all the coastal beaches... of all the spots at Del Mar... we camped out next to Royce without any pre-planning.  Go figure.

Then on Saturday... we headed out to get some Hong Kong Style Cafe for lunch.  Followed by a shopping/reading stint at Target.  Before coming home and DLC-ing for the rest of the day.

On Sunday... I found every excuse to not go to church, which was met with welcoming hands and applauds from the family.  But when I tried to snake my way out of a family gathering... it was met with resistance.  Ended up spending my nephew's 9th bday with the in-laws. Grace planned for us to sneak out for 1.5 hour to pick up dinner and grab a drink at Lazy Dog.  Haven't felt so free in a long time. 

Warriors won game 4 on Friday. Giants swept the hated Dodgers over the weekend. I led TWA with some of our older population on Sunday.  And on Sunday night... I'm balling my eyes out over another episode (or three) of Chicago Med. 

Yeah.. life is finally getting back to normal. 

The Case of the Dual Personalities

When Jesus was on earth during those 33 years... the people He despised most were the hypocritical Pharisees and Sadducees. Those who say one thing (parochial) but act another (wordly).

I've made it my mission in my Christian life to not be that "brood of vipers."  Say what I practice and practice what I say (I try... doesn't mean I succeed).  Taking the spotlight is social injustice... specifically... homosexuality.

Earlier this evening... I was invited to be a panelist for a bunch of College and Young Adults on the subject of LGBTQ+... to present a Christian view in a worldly environment.  I quickly responded... based on my personal political views, I may not be the best candidate to speak on this issue.  To which the inviter said... an Elder from church recommended me.  

This Elder... either he knows me VERY well or I have him fooled.  I'm hoping for the former. 

Unbinge-worthy

There are some things you can binge... like Friends... HIMYM... Breaking Bad... Survivor.

There are some things you can't binge.  Chicago Med.

I started watching it cuz it was recommended by {{someone.}}  On a quiet, lonely, helpless night... when I had no one to turn to... I found Dr. Rhodes... Dr. Connor... Dr. Choi... who started curing my many depths of illnesses.  Love the light it shines on our front line workers revealing they're not just health workers, but they're also humans.  They have fear.  They have pain.  They want a beer after work. 

But there's only so many times you can watch an actor pretend to intubate someone.  So many times you can hear "Charge to 200. Clear!" So many times there's an ethical vs medical dilemma. 

The formula was not meant to for binging.  And yet.... it's 2:30AM and I just got done with another episode!! #BOOM!! 

Near normal

Day 13. Still positive. But I'm walking around the house now with a mask on.  More so... I'm doing stuff around the house while wearing gloves. Gives me a chance to clean... and cook meals.  Joyce finally gets a break. 

For lunch... I tried to clean out the fridge.  And indeed I cleaned it up.  The 5 day old Chipotle leftover.  Tossed.  The 6 day old Nachos.  Tossed. 8 day old gnocchi - I ate it.  And I got sick.  May not have been from the gnocchi... possibly from the milk and cheerios which got me sick last Thursday. Half-meal after half-meal... I cleaned up the fridge.  Gosh it felt good... but it killed me that I'm wasting so much food.

Zihuatanejo - Day 11

"All I want is to be back where things make sense. Where I won’t have to be afraid all the time. Only one thing stops me: a promise I made to Andy.”

Day 11 - or is it Day 10.  

Whatever.  It's the day that, per the CDC, I can break from quarantine and escape isolation.  Why?? Why do anything?? Why not hide in my cave... my cell.. my prison? Warm meals are served 3x a day. I get coffee in the morning and tea in the evening. I now can take a stroll up and down the stairs (with a mask on, mind you) and be with the family.

What is it... that the first thing I do this Saturday morning... is drive 20 minutes to someone's house, to help her fix her iPad and fill out a bunch of low-income housing forms?

Then after lunch and some Mario-Kart... from 2PM - 7PM sharp... I gutted and sweated under the sun.  Lifting. Carrying. Setting up A/V. Directing traffic.  Taking control of the carnival games. Then breaking down everything I set up. More lifting. More carrying.  To a point... where my muscles were screaming, "Take a damn break!!  You just recovered."  And to which I slapped back, "Shaddup...."

Why not ease back into society? Why?  Cuz I made a promise.  I promised 小嫻 I would. I promised 大家姐 I would.  

Shaws-HANK 2022 - Day 10

 "Same old sh!t. Different day." 

Shaws-HANK 2022 Day 9

Today's quote... brought to you by Red who misses his friend, Andy.  

“I have to remind myself that some birds aren’t meant to be caged. Their feathers are just too bright. And when they fly away, the part of you that knows it was a sin to lock them up does rejoice."

Around 10:15AM... Joyce texts me, "Omg.  It's the worse.  Worst!" 

Apparently... a bird flew into our garage yesterday.  SW thought he saw it fly out.  Or maybe there were two birds. But this morning when she was in the garage, she saw the bird banging into window trying to fly out.  (Birds aren't that smart).  

She hates birds.  Afraid of them.  No matter how big or small.  She summoned the kids and they ended up scaring and cornering the bird underneath the dryer. The next two hours were video calls and texts on how to lure and free the bird.  Oatmeal. Water. Cheerios.  They just couldn't get the bird out.  

And then... at 12:52PM, "We released the bird."

Turns out they let the bird alone of a bit.  When NN snuck back down to the garage... she saw the bird on the garage window sill.  She "scoops" it into a box... traps it... and then liberates the beast.  Some birds... aren't meant to be caged.  When will I be freed??

Shaws-HANK 2022 Day 8

Taking a break from Shawshank Quotes today to bring you.... one of the most intense near-real time texts from a NorCal Little League championship game.

6:17PM: 4-1

6:17PM: We're losing

6:20PM: 4-2

6:51PM: T scored

6:51PM: 5-3 I think

6:52PM: Or 5-4

6:55PM: 5-4

6:55PM: He (T) had an amazing hit

6:56PM: Pass 1st 

6:58PM: It was a triple

7:09PM: 5-5

7:10PM This message was deleted

7:19PM: 5-6

7:20PM: Bottom of the 6th

7:20PM: They're batting

7:21PM: 6-6

7:21PM: 😬

7:22PM: Swamping in another pitcher

7:23PM: No outs

7:23PM: Aye

7:23PM: Runner on 3rd

7:23PM: Aye

7:24PM: They won

7:25PM: Kids crying

Then I started crying.... sports.  It can be so lift you to cloud nine.  Or rip you up apart into shreds.  So real.  So pure.